I AM SCARED APT ON FRIDAY

I AM SCARED APT ON FRIDAY
O

OKIE MIKE

Registrant
I am scared .I have a appointment on Friday
at the VA. Mental Health clinick in Tulsa to
deturmend my service conected % of disability
I was raped while I was in the US Army in
October of 1977. This has ben a major factor in
my life for several years . I have had a long battle with Drug abuse and I am on my 3rd marrage
I have had had a hard time holding a Job and my life has ben a mess for several years because of being raped .
I do not know how to explain to a shrink the influnce that this has had on my life . How can they even begin to understand the hell that I live in every day . I do not think that any one could that has not ben there . Hear it is almost 4:00 in the morning and I cannot sleep . I have had night mares for years of being raped again and I want the SOB that raped me to feel the Hell that I have had to live in all of these years
sory that I am venting again But some days I feel like I am going to Explode
 
Mike
Im sorry for your SA. I am 100% disable SC from the VA and I know what I went through. I dont think I would get my hopes up with the VA. Male rape is somthing that the VA does not have a lot of experance with. Hoping for the best.
 
Mike,

Your fear is toatlly understandable. I admire you so much for taking this courageous step. I'm glad there's someone else on this sight (wojax) with some experience dealing with what I imagine is a difficult beauracracy.

Be gentle with yourself and remember that none of this is your fault. Keep posting if that helps. We're here.
 
Mike,

The way the VA is going about this seems very cold and impersonal to me. You are expected to go for an appointment a few days before Christmas and just spill the beans about what happened to you? Usually a T will know that almost nothing about the abuse is going to come out of a survivor until some trust has been established.

Just take it a day at a time and try not to dwell on it. On Friday just try to answer their questions. It will be difficult, but hopefully you will get some help from all this.

Much love,
Larry
 
I'm going for application and interviews for
SSA and SSI disability tomorrow. I can't get out of the house to work or even look for work. I can't make telephone calls. I'm 55 and look very capable and able, but I'm not. anyone else had any experience with any of this?
Thanks.
 
Siegfried,

Some time ago I had those sorts of feelings and it turned out to be depression. I could hardly manage to get out of bed, and then when I did I would stay in a room and not want to go anywhere else - not even to the bathroom or to the kitchen. Going outside? Forget it. But on the outside I looked fine.

Have you seen a doctor about how you feel? There are a lot of different medications for depression and it often takes a lot of tinkering and trying out different things before they hit something that works, but man, what a difference!

Hope this helps.

Much love,
Larry
 
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