Here goes

Healing light

Registrant
So some weeks back I talked to the police again
They had a couple of people to speak to before speaking to the abuser in question
They said there was no rush after all he is in prison not going anywhere soon
Yesterday they have said there ready to interview him
And I have had no further updates
I don't expect him to admit anything. The pressure was just on me to tell the police, I don't expect they will be able to charge him either
But I do wonder what his face did when they told him why they was there
It will be a clear message we haven't forgotten. That his secrets are totally out. And there is nothing to come back to. That he's out on his own just incase he was in any doubt
I expect he professed his innocence again
Proclaimed a set up. They've all got it in for me. Probably still pleading it now like usual and maybe I have got it in for him but that's his own fault
I was way too ashamed to even discuss it until I joined here with anyone and I have had tons of support here
earlier this year I disclosed to friends who have supported me massively and I feel really blessed for that and now I have told him I remember and I'm not ashamed to tell , given him his shame back , confirmed the polices suspicions.
I feel my job is done there after decades
I gained some peace today

HL
 
Good for you!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!
Doing that was certainly not easy. You've given me a smile, a happy one for you because you seem quite relieved. That's what we're after, what we're seeking.
I say, let's throw a party! A monkish type one, to guard the faint of heart. But a party nonetheless!
 

KMCINVA

Registrant
So some weeks back I talked to the police again
They had a couple of people to speak to before speaking to the abuser in question
They said there was no rush after all he is in prison not going anywhere soon
Yesterday they have said there ready to interview him
And I have had no further updates
I don't expect him to admit anything. The pressure was just on me to tell the police, I don't expect they will be able to charge him either
But I do wonder what his face did when they told him why they was there
It will be a clear message we haven't forgotten. That his secrets are totally out. And there is nothing to come back to. That he's out on his own just incase he was in any doubt
I expect he professed his innocence again
Proclaimed a set up. They've all got it in for me. Probably still pleading it now like usual and maybe I have got it in for him but that's his own fault
I was way too ashamed to even discuss it until I joined here with anyone and I have had tons of support here
earlier this year I disclosed to friends who have supported me massively and I feel really blessed for that and now I have told him I remember and I'm not ashamed to tell , given him his shame back , confirmed the polices suspicions.
I feel my job is done there after decades
I gained some peace today

HL
Healing Light

It is relieving when you tell of the abuse to the authorities. I told the institution, the Diocese in the Catholic Church. I had no idea where it would go--he was relieved of any public offering of the sacraments. He was sidelined and by the time I told he was in his mid 80's. They still call and check in on me. I felt validated. My expectations were not high because of the time since the abuse. It was for me, to tell the institution the scumbag hurt me as a child. I was fortunate another of his victim's came forward at the same time. It put him the hot seat of having to face the question did he abuse children. That was satisfaction for me.

It took me over 45 years to come forward. It was a complete breakdown that caused me to come forward. It took over almost 7 years after facing the abuse that I feel I am on near the end of the healing curve. I do not believe I will ever cross the finish line, healing is a life long journey.

I am proud of you for stepping forward and telling the police. I hope that gave you a sense of satisfaction and validation.

Kevin
 

Healing light

Registrant
Good for you!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!
Doing that was certainly not easy. You've given me a smile, a happy one for you because you seem quite relieved. That's what we're after, what we're seeking.
I say, let's throw a party! A monkish type one, to guard the faint of heart. But a party nonetheless!
I am relieved.
When I first disclosed to police in 2014, I didn't tell them about this one off incident I told them about the long term abuse in my family
I didn't tell them for many reasons but one of them was him being in prison I was under the impression he had a longer sentence to find out more recently they had set his provisional release date it was a huge shock. There was also the shame and his brother, my friend, I knew that he would struggle to comprehend I knew it would impact on him and I didn't want to make his life any more difficult back in 2014 when it was already difficult then. So very many reasons that over the years has become less significant. His release date being set caused a flurry of comments on social media and his brother aware of my healing from family abuse asked me in a message " do you think my brother is not right with boys like X says because they should never let him out if he is one of those aswell"
And I was done in. Your meant to be truthful to your friends right? I went to ask X why he had said that on social media and he layed out his reasons why ending with ' there's no smoke without fire and a leopard never changes there spots " ... So would my friends believe me if I was honest I thought, I had been believed here when I told disclosing to friends was so huge It took longer to contact the police

Over two decades have passed since the actual event but it's still very hard for me and still impacts. I always regretted not telling years before my abusers went on to abuse more people. My own silence was deafening

I'm definitely up for a monkish party lol and I really appreciate your post

Peace
HL
 

Dan99

Registrant
So some weeks back I talked to the police again
They had a couple of people to speak to before speaking to the abuser in question
They said there was no rush after all he is in prison not going anywhere soon
Yesterday they have said there ready to interview him
And I have had no further updates
I don't expect him to admit anything. The pressure was just on me to tell the police, I don't expect they will be able to charge him either
But I do wonder what his face did when they told him why they was there
It will be a clear message we haven't forgotten. That his secrets are totally out. And there is nothing to come back to. That he's out on his own just incase he was in any doubt
I expect he professed his innocence again
Proclaimed a set up. They've all got it in for me. Probably still pleading it now like usual and maybe I have got it in for him but that's his own fault
I was way too ashamed to even discuss it until I joined here with anyone and I have had tons of support here
earlier this year I disclosed to friends who have supported me massively and I feel really blessed for that and now I have told him I remember and I'm not ashamed to tell , given him his shame back , confirmed the polices suspicions.
I feel my job is done there after decades
I gained some peace today

HL
Congratulations. I had a very similar experience and you expressed the emotion so well. Would I rather have seen the perp jailed for what he did to me? Yes. But there is relief in knowing I did what was right and declared that I know what happened was wrong and I'm not backing down. Not 6 years old anymore. Hope you're savoring this success.
 

Healing light

Registrant
Healing Light

It is relieving when you tell of the abuse to the authorities. I told the institution, the Diocese in the Catholic Church. I had no idea where it would go--he was relieved of any public offering of the sacraments. He was sidelined and by the time I told he was in his mid 80's. They still call and check in on me. I felt validated. My expectations were not high because of the time since the abuse. It was for me, to tell the institution the scumbag hurt me as a child. I was fortunate another of his victim's came forward at the same time. It put him the hot seat of having to face the question did he abuse children. That was satisfaction for me.

It took me over 45 years to come forward. It was a complete breakdown that caused me to come forward. It took over almost 7 years after facing the abuse that I feel I am on near the end of the healing curve. I do not believe I will ever cross the finish line, healing is a life long journey.

I am proud of you for stepping forward and telling the police. I hope that gave you a sense of satisfaction and validation.

Kevin
Thank you for sharing I appreciate it

I'm pleased I have , I wasn't expecting it to bring as much positive feelings as doing it has

Thanks for the support
Wishing you peace in your healing journey
HL
 

Healing light

Registrant
Congratulations. I had a very similar experience and you expressed the emotion so well. Would I rather have seen the perp jailed for what he did to me? Yes. But there is relief in knowing I did what was right and declared that I know what happened was wrong and I'm not backing down. Not 6 years old anymore. Hope you're savoring this success.
Thanks for sharing I appreciate it

I like you would rather he was jailed for it to , but knowing the process, I know it's highly unlikely, sadly.
Thanks I am definitely savouring the moment thank you for your supportive post

Wishing you peace in your healing
HL
 
So some weeks back I talked to the police again
They had a couple of people to speak to before speaking to the abuser in question
They said there was no rush after all he is in prison not going anywhere soon
Yesterday they have said there ready to interview him
And I have had no further updates
I don't expect him to admit anything. The pressure was just on me to tell the police, I don't expect they will be able to charge him either
But I do wonder what his face did when they told him why they was there
It will be a clear message we haven't forgotten. That his secrets are totally out. And there is nothing to come back to. That he's out on his own just incase he was in any doubt
I expect he professed his innocence again
Proclaimed a set up. They've all got it in for me. Probably still pleading it now like usual and maybe I have got it in for him but that's his own fault
I was way too ashamed to even discuss it until I joined here with anyone and I have had tons of support here
earlier this year I disclosed to friends who have supported me massively and I feel really blessed for that and now I have told him I remember and I'm not ashamed to tell , given him his shame back , confirmed the polices suspicions.
I feel my job is done there after decades
I gained some peace today

HL
Hi HL

I hope it is all behind you now. I am glad you have the strength it takes to disclose your pain and send it back to the people it belongs to.

Good for you standing up. I am proud of you. I also have your back my friend.
 

Healing light

Registrant
Hi HL

I hope it is all behind you now. I am glad you have the strength it takes to disclose your pain and send it back to the people it belongs to.

Good for you standing up. I am proud of you. I also have your back my friend.
I really appreciate the fact you have my back. It wasn't until I joined here that I realised I wasn't alone with this incident that my feelings were all normal.
There's a massive amount of closure, and no more regrets in the future so I think it's a good distance behind me now.
I appreciate your post my friend
HL
 
Hey HL,

I am glad you gained some peace today and I really hope that it grows for you as we move through time. Maybe the piece of peace can be planted like tree seed to continuously grow as you move through your life. I wish I would have had the strength, when I was younger to do something about mine, when I still could but that is no longer an option. The laws must be much different there than they are here. Back in my time, when someone put their hands on you a clock started ticking, and if you did not say something within seven years of the act, you are, well, shit out of luck. In my time that statute of limitations, state law, was seven years, and that was it. However, I am very glad you were able to rattle the cage of this individual and it made you feel empowered to do so. I am very happy for you it has helped you to heal some and only more of that follows you in your life.

With Deep Respect,
jrperkey010101
 

Healing light

Registrant
Hey HL,

I am glad you gained some peace today and I really hope that it grows for you as we move through time. Maybe the piece of peace can be planted like tree seed to continuously grow as you move through your life. I wish I would have had the strength, when I was younger to do something about mine, when I still could but that is no longer an option. The laws must be much different there than they are here. Back in my time, when someone put their hands on you a clock started ticking, and if you did not say something within seven years of the act, you are, well, shit out of luck. In my time that statute of limitations, state law, was seven years, and that was it. However, I am very glad you were able to rattle the cage of this individual and it made you feel empowered to do so. I am very happy for you it has helped you to heal some and only more of that follows you in your life.

With Deep Respect,
jrperkey010101
Hi

Thanks for your post I appreciate it

In the UK there is no time limit for murder , manslaughter , dangerous driving , abuse cases or gbh and other serious crimes normally tried at crown court
There is however some limitations for those that would be tried at magistrates and would hold a custodial sentence 6 months or less

I actually think it's bad places have limits on serious crimes to many people suffer because of it in my opinion

Yes he needed his cage rattling.

Peace
HL
 

Aaron3333

Registrant
Hi HL,

Amazing effort. Congratulations. In amongst the trauma some of these personal initiatives to take back some control can serve us well I think.

I also think when people like you take this step, you help show a path for others to do the same, and the more who do it, the more abusers held accountable.

From the perspective of some personal satisfaction, even if he denies it, he will feel a neverending weight for what he has done and he will remain eternally worried about what's around the corner. That is as it should be.

Best of luck for the days ahead. It's hard to prosecute these cases and the numbers aren't on our side, but there's value and a sprinkling of justice in the process itself.
 
I am happy you did gain some peace. I really don’t know what to say other than your are a good person who has helped me and I hope you find more peace.
 

Healing light

Registrant
Hi HL,

Amazing effort. Congratulations. In amongst the trauma some of these personal initiatives to take back some control can serve us well I think.

I also think when people like you take this step, you help show a path for others to do the same, and the more who do it, the more abusers held accountable.

From the perspective of some personal satisfaction, even if he denies it, he will feel a neverending weight for what he has done and he will remain eternally worried about what's around the corner. That is as it should be.

Best of luck for the days ahead. It's hard to prosecute these cases and the numbers aren't on our side, but there's value and a sprinkling of justice in the process itself.
Thanks I really appreciate your post.

There were so very many reasons why it was the right thing to do. I can't turn back time but I could change the future and if and that's a big if , they get a conviction it's not just justice for me but it would halt his parole that I can't believe there even contemplating but as is the British justice system

Yes I'm hoping he's reeling a little. I should say it was quite a shock. And like the police said I have picked my timing the is value in the process

Good luck to you too and I wish you peace in your healing

HL
 

Healing light

Registrant
I am happy you did gain some peace. I really don’t know what to say other than your are a good person who has helped me and I hope you find more peace.
Thanks for your post SMC I appreciate it it's really kind of you
I hope you find peace in healing too

Peace
HL
 
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