Help Dealing with Porn

Help Dealing with Porn

Trew

Registrant
Most of my life I didn't remember the abuse that happened to me. It was placed in a box and put away for what was probably meant to be forever. The only way I think it ever emerged was through a dream I would have on and off for most of my adult life about a sexual encounter with a man. Now I have alway considered myself a heterosexual. I have a wife and kids and have always dated the opposite sex. But throughout my life when I would have these dreams I would doubt myself and would wonder why. Well instead of getting help I turned to porn and tried to work through and understand if there was a attraction there and I think I was actually developing an addiction to porn. Now that through a series of events that caused everything in my life to come crashing down around me I remembered that I was rapped as a young boy and I now have some understanding about where those dreams came from and that they were not dreams but actually nightmares. I have gotten help and I have stopped looking at porn. I am trying to move on and live a healthy life without using any of the bad coping skills I used to survive. My wife has been very supportive and extremely forgiving but she wonders about the draw to gay porn. Will it come back will it always be there. I tell her no but I was wondering if anyone out there has gone through or going through anything similar and could offer some advice. Thank you.
 
Hey @Fubbbcd, just wanted to point out that this thread was from 2017 which is the last time the original poster ever posted anything, so if you're expecting a response from him you're going to be disappointed.

I'm glad you're posting, though. It seems like writing about your experience is really helping you.
 
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