Happy and Sad - Work

[markgreyblue]

hey -

I have some possibly helpful observations.

I was up with the sun -

and this is the time of joy for me -

I got busy putting my day together -

cleaning up the mess of my room -

but as things progressed - I great tired -

I couldn't be so tired with so little done -

so I really wanted and needed to accomplish more -

I found that at first I felt the need to protect my body by moving slower -

and then -

as it went on -

I found - my thoughts went inward -

I thought about my father and his limitation -

how I seem to be more his father than he mine -

and thus it was the case growiong up -

and actually - i have grown to see this more peacefully -

i worked on - and saw how cultures of those days -

if you didn't fit the form - forced you into it -

until you warped - perhaps - and the litle boy scared - is still there - frightened to all

servitude-

sad for my dad - so sad -

but he should not have been so mean -

asshole -

so onward working - and now - I see it too

the hard work - on and on - made me begin to see the reality of my life - in colors - of fatigue -

sad and down - and my self worth - not much -

it seems do to this scrambled battle with illness -

what chances ----

In truth though the triumph of this time was the sight of HOW this was brought ON!!!

too much work !!! caused me to go from Happy - 'joy' too

sad and down -

hey perhaps you might see this for yourself -
and be able to better manage those times for you

and see how super you really are!

i love you guys -

thanks for being my brothers family and life.

Mark

 

[markgreyblue]

crying some sorry

 

[RICK57]

Mark - sometimes working lifts me up when I see that I have achieved something! Other times it knocks me down when it just feels like drudgery.

Over the last few days I have cut the climbers back in my yard and let in some light - that makes me feel better!

I am off to work (my job ) shortly, and I'd much rather have the day off today! I enjoy my job, I'm just not in the mood for it!

Best wishes ..Rik

 

[markgreyblue]

Thanks Rik!

((((big hugs)))))

have a good one!



Mgb