Gratitude and Reveral

[wreckage]

Hello All,
Wanted to check in because mornings are alway tough for me as I have not been off scramble in my head for a long time. It's like I can see the place I want to be but a glass wall is preventing me from going there.

I am grateful for the feedback I've received about being 16 and 17 and still seeking out the connection with strange men. I must come to terms with why I did that and also accept that when I was 12 and 15 I was molested-period.

Identity and who I am is an issue. Sometimes I sexualize everything and everybody I am around. How to undo this?

 

[DanielQ432]

It's like I can see the place I want to be but a glass wall is preventing me from going there.

....

Yes, I often feel that way. I described it to my therapist as a deep canyon separating me from the future and potential that I want to achieve. I can see what I want, but can't figure out how to scale the walls and get to the other side.

 

[wreckage]

I was just thinking that perhaps we are already on the other side and we don't know it or are invisible to ourselves.

Seems like living day-to-day is what life is about and we are not faking it.

Being rooted in the now helps.

 

[Shyshark]

I think the canyon analogy is better.

A thick glass wall is something too difficult to break through and represents a 'one shot deal' whereas climbing allows for having to take a step or two back and then beginning again to climb. It's never a steady progress but a process allowing more flexibility.
Looking forward provides a goal ... even if it's a struggle get there.

Nobody said it would be easy.

 

[Tom E.]

Keep on fighting for your right to be a healthy you!

 

[sorryson]

Wreckage you are not a wreck you are a rising piece of art. You are fighting and finding positive words. Keep going and you will see you have done more to get better than you know.

Paul

 

[wreckage]

Thank you for the encouraging words. What's weird is that there is a fear that comes over me when I am emerging into the real me/old me/new? me.
I guess it's just one foot in fron to of the other.