Free Association II
So I was speaking about support.
And I have learned that some of the best support came from something I never thought I could do.
Telling people, eye to eye, what happened to me. I don't mean a therapist, although that was the first step, and not other survivors, which was the second step, which I did at a retreat two years ago, and at this site and some others. And I don't mean relatives or significant others, although that was the next step for me.
I'm talking about friends. There are four now that I have told. It took me a long time - too long because of the LIES I still believed, but now it has happened. Two of them in just the last few weeks.
And I can't tell you how liberating this has been. I have spoken the truth to people and they have heard me and amazing things happened.
The fear, and the shame, and the anger have all gotten smaller and less powerful. The beauty and power of TRUTH, of Witnessing, of letting it out have kicked the sh*t out of the walls I built. It has exposed more LIES than I knew existed.
And it has spread beyond just me. I was able to tell you all about it in my posts and it is being reflected back at me from you every day.
And so today.... Well today something new began, and it was wonderful, and it brought one of my "Soulmates" to mind. I'm talking about John Lennon and so when I got home tonight I posted a few of his songs that mean so much to me.
And one that kind of explains what's happening to me lately, Coming Out of the Dark.
Please turn to part three.......
And I have learned that some of the best support came from something I never thought I could do.
Telling people, eye to eye, what happened to me. I don't mean a therapist, although that was the first step, and not other survivors, which was the second step, which I did at a retreat two years ago, and at this site and some others. And I don't mean relatives or significant others, although that was the next step for me.
I'm talking about friends. There are four now that I have told. It took me a long time - too long because of the LIES I still believed, but now it has happened. Two of them in just the last few weeks.
And I can't tell you how liberating this has been. I have spoken the truth to people and they have heard me and amazing things happened.
The fear, and the shame, and the anger have all gotten smaller and less powerful. The beauty and power of TRUTH, of Witnessing, of letting it out have kicked the sh*t out of the walls I built. It has exposed more LIES than I knew existed.
And it has spread beyond just me. I was able to tell you all about it in my posts and it is being reflected back at me from you every day.
And so today.... Well today something new began, and it was wonderful, and it brought one of my "Soulmates" to mind. I'm talking about John Lennon and so when I got home tonight I posted a few of his songs that mean so much to me.
And one that kind of explains what's happening to me lately, Coming Out of the Dark.
Please turn to part three.......