First Post

[EQCR]

Being a gay kid in the 80's sucked for me. Being treated as a second husband for my bipolar mom was worse. From age 11 to age 22 when she killed herself with a shotgun after I asked her to stop. My Grandma burned her suicide letter, so I don't even get that. My father acts like he didn't know, like his wife sleeping on the couch for a decade is normal. Now, at age 45 I just want to be that kid again, and grow up and have a sane life.

 

[victor-victim]

dear EQCR,
i welcome you to malesurvivor forum.
hope you find something hopeful and helpful here.

we are all making it up as we go.

i am glad you found the courage to step up and speak out about your life.

we are here to listen.

 

[Still]

EQCR

Very glad you survived it.

I rarely reply to Introductions posts, as I find them too painful to even read.

I was your age (46) when I decided to deal with it all head-on and directly, rather than by unhealthy proxy.

I hope you have great resources to put toward this and help you along (like people in your life, therapists, books, etc). You'll find a LOT of resources here.

 

[Bluedogone]

Hey EQCR - Welcome to MS,

It's never too late to be a kid again, especially when you missed it the first time around. As you join us in healing the past hurts and pains that childhood abuse can bring, I hope you find some of the stuff that makes it possible to live a sane life.

Peace, and best wishes as you heal.

CJ

 

[Bluedogone]

---

 

[smc1972]

EQCR,

I to so wish I could go back in time. Though my past was not as traumatic as yours and in reality i had a pretty good childhood. Yet for me I hit 42 and things just seemed to unravel for me and I later found thus site. It has helped me though at times I wish I did not have to deal with the past.

 

[Bardo]

EQCR,
This place is filled with good men who have suffered horribly at the hands of someone whom they trusted. No two lives are the same, but I know you will find a welcoming and supportive group here, who are eager to walk with you along the path of healing. Glad you found us!

Freeman

 

[woodenshoes]

Eqcr

Welcome, but sorry you need to be here. Great group og people here.

Ws

 

[EQCR]

thanks for the kind words everyone.

 

[Strive 38/11]

Hey EQCR

I listen hear feel and think about wanting to be a kid again, and growing up to have a sane life. That's all me too. I'm working on this. I write in an app each morning in my goal "what would you tell your younger yourself". I reward him with praise and ask him to participate in my day. It helps. I'm 48 caring for my elderly father who abandoned me as a child, so now is the time. Be a person who chooses to improve yourself.

In kindness to the boy within

Strive 38/11