finding love in life's strange twists
It has been some time since I last fell in love I must admit, but I think I have found it once again. I sit here right now, realizing that I have well...fell in love with a man. I do not know exactly what to say except that amidst life's strange twists, I think I have found exactly what I have been yearning for. After a year of pure experimentation and falling into the pits of despair/mistakes/stupidity, I think I am once again at that threshold of all that I want. It is ironic perhaps that part of my drive to succeed, per se, seems to have fizzled out. Still, perhaps I have found what success truly is--in what is important to ME (love, helping others, using my abilities, having fun even) not those of others (degrees, competition, money).
I have been through so much, just as my lover has--in fact, my lover has been through more. Still, he has lived on and as have I. He is a beautiful man--much like my ex-girlfriend, but this one seems true...not that my ex will ever be anything less than a special part of my soul. Despite some of my own insecurities, he really seems genuine and so beautiful.
Hmmm...I do not know exactly why I write this on here, except that this site has helped me heal and just wanted to share something which I did not expect. I think I have healed from my abuse, and reconciled it, my emerging sexuality, and my faith. Now, it is time for me to live my life. After nearly dying (long story), I have been given another chance. I love this man that I have met now, and my life is no longer the same.
I tread nervously as everything becomes so uncertain--now that I have taken the so-called "less-trodden path." It will be difficult, and perhaps I admit I may even lose my lover somehow...nevertheless, I feel I am truly tested now. I have lived and survived so much--just as you all have--it's time to live my life and put it all together.
Thank you to all of you who have helped me with your kind words in the past. For those of you with whom I have not had the privelege of talking, use this site. There are a lot of good people here, and whatever you do, never give up. You've survived this much, don't give up now. Sometimes, just sometimes you may very well find yourself in another of life's strange twists...a way for all probabilities to be defied. God Bless.
I have been through so much, just as my lover has--in fact, my lover has been through more. Still, he has lived on and as have I. He is a beautiful man--much like my ex-girlfriend, but this one seems true...not that my ex will ever be anything less than a special part of my soul. Despite some of my own insecurities, he really seems genuine and so beautiful.
Hmmm...I do not know exactly why I write this on here, except that this site has helped me heal and just wanted to share something which I did not expect. I think I have healed from my abuse, and reconciled it, my emerging sexuality, and my faith. Now, it is time for me to live my life. After nearly dying (long story), I have been given another chance. I love this man that I have met now, and my life is no longer the same.
I tread nervously as everything becomes so uncertain--now that I have taken the so-called "less-trodden path." It will be difficult, and perhaps I admit I may even lose my lover somehow...nevertheless, I feel I am truly tested now. I have lived and survived so much--just as you all have--it's time to live my life and put it all together.
Thank you to all of you who have helped me with your kind words in the past. For those of you with whom I have not had the privelege of talking, use this site. There are a lot of good people here, and whatever you do, never give up. You've survived this much, don't give up now. Sometimes, just sometimes you may very well find yourself in another of life's strange twists...a way for all probabilities to be defied. God Bless.
