Feeling like a man
I read the posts on this forum and want to jump out of my skin cause I relate big time. Thing is, i'm tired of being a "me, me, me" person - I wonder what it is that makes men armor so strong they go through life with this crap on their soul.
I guess what i'm trying to say, is that I feel like I sold my armor for some polish. Does that make sense?
I don't want to be this "touchy, feely, me, me, me" type of guy. Why's everything have to be "perfect".
The only thing keeping me here is the sense that, in the end - no matter what, people ache from what they carry inside. No one is immune to this suffering.
In much larger perspective, were becoming more compassionate society - people care about people they dont know (Tsunami victims, for example). In a way, there's this healing spirit, essence, or whatever you want to call it.
I'm rambling, but its helping. So, anyway, alot of newer music in the rock genre has (what I call) Therapy Rock. Bands like Chevelle, Offspring, Greenday - mostly punk but mainstream, these are people that wanna heal inside. So, when I start to think i'm all alone in this i'll think of the people here at MaleSurvivor, and of the motivation to get good inside - to be the man i'll be.
Then, i'll feel sorry for those bearing armor "to be a man". But, i'll remain in awe at their strength. Sometimes, I think some of us were born to suffer to show that there is survival after victimisation.
Sorry to sound like a Hallmark card, but, i'm kind of tired and only typing what I feel. I read that's a milestone - of speaking your mind. So, guys (and girls) dont be afraid to talk or post. It helps, not only youself, but me and others (I think) as well.
I guess what i'm trying to say, is that I feel like I sold my armor for some polish. Does that make sense?
I don't want to be this "touchy, feely, me, me, me" type of guy. Why's everything have to be "perfect".
The only thing keeping me here is the sense that, in the end - no matter what, people ache from what they carry inside. No one is immune to this suffering.
In much larger perspective, were becoming more compassionate society - people care about people they dont know (Tsunami victims, for example). In a way, there's this healing spirit, essence, or whatever you want to call it.
I'm rambling, but its helping. So, anyway, alot of newer music in the rock genre has (what I call) Therapy Rock. Bands like Chevelle, Offspring, Greenday - mostly punk but mainstream, these are people that wanna heal inside. So, when I start to think i'm all alone in this i'll think of the people here at MaleSurvivor, and of the motivation to get good inside - to be the man i'll be.
Then, i'll feel sorry for those bearing armor "to be a man". But, i'll remain in awe at their strength. Sometimes, I think some of us were born to suffer to show that there is survival after victimisation.
Sorry to sound like a Hallmark card, but, i'm kind of tired and only typing what I feel. I read that's a milestone - of speaking your mind. So, guys (and girls) dont be afraid to talk or post. It helps, not only youself, but me and others (I think) as well.
Now there's some pain that will go away soon!