Everything in my life just now hitting home

Everything in my life just now hitting home
A

andrew76

Registrant
I always hate it when I am told something one day but it does not hit home until either days later or the next day.Was told yesterday that the doctors want to give me medication to kill off my cancer without first going in and just taking it all out they want to try a more conservative method first and if it does not shrink my cancer or kill it off then 4 to 6 months from now then they will take me and operate but not before then meanwhile I get to live with it another 6 months if I live that long to see it happen.

I am so tired of fighting just want to give up,the energy is just not there anymore maybe this is a sign that my life as I have known it is over,I sure hope right now that this will be the case.Everything hitting like a ton of bricks being thrown at 100mph and having to either dodge them or let them hit me. :(
 
Andrew,

I have a friend who had a battle with cancer last year, and I remember how terrified and upset *I* was by it. I cannot imagine to be the one dealing with all.

I am sorry it seems they are doing things bass-ackwards. I am sure they have their reasons for doing the treatments as they are, but I am sure it is quite frightening and unsettling for you in the meantime. I wish you did not have to go through this at all.

Please allow yourself to feel anything you feel, and know that you and whatever emotions you have are accepted here. Again, I can not imagine how exhausted, upset, and frustrated you are. Please do take care of yourself.

Leosha
 
Andrew
perhaps, in a somewhat perverse way, being a CSA Survivor has given you the strength, courage and some useful tools to fight your cancer?

I have a friend who was diagnosed with lung cancer over 15 years ago, and I'm convinced his attitude has been the key to him beating it.
He learned quickly, people like us have a bit of experience to begin with.

Take care, and don't be shy about using all the support you need.

Dave
 
Andrew - please take whatever opportunities you have to get over this. I'm not going to beat around the bush, but you still have hope. We're also here to support you (I know it's not the same as being able to talk to someone directly, but we do want you to come out of this stronger).

When I was 15, one of my best friends(16) was hit by a truck/wagon and killed instantly - he didn't have a chance - please live for him!!

Best wishes ...Rik

*I've also known people that have won/lost similar battles - please keep going.
 
Andrew:

I am so sorry to hear that you're going thru this hardship. I'm by no means an authority on cancer OR a doctor, but if they are recommending Chemotherapy first, then there's a good chance that this is a better option than surgery. When they operate, it is my understanding that they MUST make sure that they are able to get every cancer cell. The chemotherapy is most likely the better choice because those medications know how to target specific cells.

I KNOW that this isn't what you want to hear. I had hoped myself to get my spinal fusion out of the way this month, but in the end have to wait until the end of November JUST to see the doctor. Meanwhile, I'm in disabling pain 24/7. But, I have to look ahead and remind myself to the fact that I'm getting the top surgeon in the state and it's my life and health that's at stake.

No, I'm not dealing with cancer, but I understand how frustrating it is when a "carrot" is dangled in front of your face only to be snatched away. Like the others said, allow yourself to feel and try to keep your strength up. Keep fighting because there is a lot to be said for attitude and health. There IS life after cancer - it is not the same as it was only 10 years ago. There are so many new drugs and equipment in the fight against this disease.

You're in my thoughts, guy.

SD
 
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