Enraged (Triggers)
Bill_h_pike
Registrant
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Enraged (Triggers)
- Thread starterBill_h_pike
- Start date
reality2k4
Registrant
Bill,
too tired to post right now, get back tomorrow
on this subject k,
ste
Have to rest
too tired to post right now, get back tomorrow
on this subject k,
ste
Have to rest
JediKnight
Registrant
Bill,
You definitely made the right choice to come forward. If you had suppressed this experience, it would just have re-emerged in some matter later in your life. You have certainly saved many other boys from victimization by this perp.
Good luck to you
Jedi
You definitely made the right choice to come forward. If you had suppressed this experience, it would just have re-emerged in some matter later in your life. You have certainly saved many other boys from victimization by this perp.
Good luck to you
Jedi
roadrunner
Registrant
Bill,
On the use of the pictures he took of you, imagine what would have happened if you had NOT exposed him? The pictures would have been circulated for years and many more boys could have been hurt as a result. You did the right thing.
On the consequences of all this for you, I hope your parents will talk to the DA's office and with your local office for child protective services. They can reassure you and your parents on what will and will not happen in court, if the case ever comes to that. I am very sure they will be able to assure you that this will not be a TV fiasco like the Michael Jackson trial. There are strict rules on how a court case may treat a boy who has been abused.
On your school situation, again the DA's office ought to be able to help. Don't you have a case worker assigned to you? His/her job is to keep you informed but also to help with these other things. Someone like this can talk to the school's headmaster or principal and explain the situation, but then the principal would not be allowed to disclose details about you to your teachers. The teachers will simply be advised that you have valid reasons for your problems.
Above all, Bill, remember that you have already told your parents what happened. That was the worst part. Now you should allow yourself to trust them and let them help you through this.
Don't shut them out now and try to cope on your own. It's okay to be scared and confused. Ask any adult here, and they will tell you how difficult (or impossible) they would have found it to do what YOU have done so far. Just remember that one very important part of recovery is learning to ask for the things you need.
Much love,
Larry
On the use of the pictures he took of you, imagine what would have happened if you had NOT exposed him? The pictures would have been circulated for years and many more boys could have been hurt as a result. You did the right thing.
On the consequences of all this for you, I hope your parents will talk to the DA's office and with your local office for child protective services. They can reassure you and your parents on what will and will not happen in court, if the case ever comes to that. I am very sure they will be able to assure you that this will not be a TV fiasco like the Michael Jackson trial. There are strict rules on how a court case may treat a boy who has been abused.
On your school situation, again the DA's office ought to be able to help. Don't you have a case worker assigned to you? His/her job is to keep you informed but also to help with these other things. Someone like this can talk to the school's headmaster or principal and explain the situation, but then the principal would not be allowed to disclose details about you to your teachers. The teachers will simply be advised that you have valid reasons for your problems.
Above all, Bill, remember that you have already told your parents what happened. That was the worst part. Now you should allow yourself to trust them and let them help you through this.
Don't shut them out now and try to cope on your own. It's okay to be scared and confused. Ask any adult here, and they will tell you how difficult (or impossible) they would have found it to do what YOU have done so far. Just remember that one very important part of recovery is learning to ask for the things you need.
Much love,
Larry
Bill_h_pike
Registrant
*
Bill,
Hold on to your dreams. Your perp took many things from you sure but only YOU can let go of your dreams.
Your young and have made the best start ever. I only wish I had the courage you do when I was your age. It took me 20 years to do what you did.
I flunked school because of my abuse but I never let go of my dreams. I went back to school at 24, when I was ready and got the education I wanted.
Stick at it, you can and will beat this.
Good Luck, peace and respect to you.
Hold on to your dreams. Your perp took many things from you sure but only YOU can let go of your dreams.
Your young and have made the best start ever. I only wish I had the courage you do when I was your age. It took me 20 years to do what you did.
I flunked school because of my abuse but I never let go of my dreams. I went back to school at 24, when I was ready and got the education I wanted.
Stick at it, you can and will beat this.
Good Luck, peace and respect to you.
I did the court thing and it was a little hard, but the DA did a really good job of telling me step by step what would happen. You did the right thing, and in your heart you know that.
I dropped out of college because of all the issues I had due to the abuse. But over a decade later I went back and used those old credits and will finish that degree in May.
Testifying may be painful but it will be a part of your healing, and much like removing a splinter can hurt, you will feel a lot better after.
If you have any questions feel free to PM me.
It will take time but if you work hard, gradually things will improve.
If I can do it, anyone can do it.
I dropped out of college because of all the issues I had due to the abuse. But over a decade later I went back and used those old credits and will finish that degree in May.
Testifying may be painful but it will be a part of your healing, and much like removing a splinter can hurt, you will feel a lot better after.
If you have any questions feel free to PM me.
It will take time but if you work hard, gradually things will improve.
If I can do it, anyone can do it.
Bill, we are with you. Don't give up. I find myself at a loss for words here because I know what you mean by not being able to concentrate on your school work and being the first in your family to go to college. It just makes me want to say Don't give up, you are going to make it. I feel your pain and I hope and pray that this will soon pass.
melliferal
Registrant
This is the EXACT set of thoughts over which I've been psychologically torturing myself for the last 15 years. It's not fun. I don't know how likely it is that my face is out there being circulated on the net; but when I see news stories about people being caught with tens to hundreds of thousands of images on their computers, sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't be asking what the chances are that they have my images, but rather what the chances are that they dont.
And you don't know - wait, I take that back; maybe you DO know - how really sick it makes me, when I hear people who get caught with child porn on their computers say things like, "It's only a picture". I actually read this in my local paper the other day; there's a perv near here who got caught with child porn on his computer. He's a registered sex offender now, and it turns out the local cops have just figured out that he lives too close to an elementary school. The city has told him to move, and says it will give him adequate time to do so - but his father (who doesn't live with him) is complaining that the perv is being harassed. He actually says "All he had was some pictures on his computer - he would never hurt a kid". Abso-fecking-lutely amazing.
Still and all, you've caught the source. If they have this guy with images on his computer, there's simply no legal magic any defense team can work. He's going to jail for a Very Long Time. I see a party in your future.
ScottyTodd
Registrant
Bill - I am enraged along with you!!! How incredibly brave to speak up and take on the power to stop that MONSTER!! Who knows how many kids you saved from his torture! In my book, you absolutely did the right thing!! It may not feel like it now...but he no longer has that control on you nor others!
I don't know where you're located but many counties have Victim's Assistance Programs (sometimes called NOVA). You may want to hook up with them. They are experienced in sexual victimization treatment/support and will walk with you through the court process as well as interceding with your school. The DA's office should be helpful in setting this up for you. If not, look in the phone book for victim' support systems.
If you have problems with this or questions, you can PM me and I'll locate a like agency for you!
Howard
I don't know where you're located but many counties have Victim's Assistance Programs (sometimes called NOVA). You may want to hook up with them. They are experienced in sexual victimization treatment/support and will walk with you through the court process as well as interceding with your school. The DA's office should be helpful in setting this up for you. If not, look in the phone book for victim' support systems.
If you have problems with this or questions, you can PM me and I'll locate a like agency for you!
Howard
Bill_h_pike
Registrant
*
reality2k4
Registrant
Bill,
that stinks that you could not get the grades you wanted, but is there any other chance to get another shot at it?
I flunked all my exams, when teachers thought I would get top marks, but somehow fell to pieces with exams.
It is so hard when you seem to try and try, then not be able to succeed when you should.
Try and feel a little confident that you did your best.
I hope you can find another shot at it, but you have not let your parents down, I am sure they are proud of your efforts,
ste
that stinks that you could not get the grades you wanted, but is there any other chance to get another shot at it?
I flunked all my exams, when teachers thought I would get top marks, but somehow fell to pieces with exams.
It is so hard when you seem to try and try, then not be able to succeed when you should.
Try and feel a little confident that you did your best.
I hope you can find another shot at it, but you have not let your parents down, I am sure they are proud of your efforts,
ste
roadrunner
Registrant
Bill,
PLEASE take up Scotty Todd's offer of help with contacts for all these problems. You and your parents should not hesitate to ask for the help you need, and yes, someone does need to make your school understand what you are going through. As I said before, this CAN be done in a way that doesn't compromise your anonymity.
Much love,
Larry
PLEASE take up Scotty Todd's offer of help with contacts for all these problems. You and your parents should not hesitate to ask for the help you need, and yes, someone does need to make your school understand what you are going through. As I said before, this CAN be done in a way that doesn't compromise your anonymity.
Much love,
Larry
roadrunner
Registrant
Bill,
Just as I sent the other post I remembered something else. It's important enough to post separately and I hope you will think about this.
About one in six boys are abused. How many kids are in your school? One in six means that for every 100 boys in your school 17 have been abused!
You are definitely not alone. Some of these boys are still suffering silently. Others are getting help and fighting back, as you are. With the exception of the principal and the counselors, however, NO ONE in the school has any clue about this.
Much love,
Larry
Just as I sent the other post I remembered something else. It's important enough to post separately and I hope you will think about this.
About one in six boys are abused. How many kids are in your school? One in six means that for every 100 boys in your school 17 have been abused!
You are definitely not alone. Some of these boys are still suffering silently. Others are getting help and fighting back, as you are. With the exception of the principal and the counselors, however, NO ONE in the school has any clue about this.
Much love,
Larry
Bill,
Just want to say that you have my support. You have been a courageous young man to get this far. Just hold on and trust your folks to help you through. Talk to them about how you're feeling.
Safe hugs,
John
Just want to say that you have my support. You have been a courageous young man to get this far. Just hold on and trust your folks to help you through. Talk to them about how you're feeling.
Safe hugs,
John