DS is a predator

DS is a predator
R

Robby

Registrant
I was a victim of SA at 13 at the hands of [edited]. He was a teacher and coach. I want to hold the scumbag piece of shit accountable. This happened in Michigan about 1981. I know that the Statue of Limitations probably has run out but I want to find this guy and stop him from working with kids. He probably works in youth baseball, or parks and recreation, or coach kids in some capacity. I think that he moved to Florida.

I want to locate him and show him that he can not do what he did to me and not suffer the consequences of his actions. Unfortunately the piece of shits name is [edited]. It couldnt be more common.

I now live in Texas but am going home this weekend. I am very close with my family and have told them about the abuse over the last two years. They are very supportive. I also have a lot of incredible friends at home and I will probably tell a couple of them on this trip. They know this teacher and coach from when we were growing up and because he tried to be around kids as much as possible (I know some other friends must have been victims). I am not ashamed to tell them. Through them, I can probably find out where he is and what he is doing. Then maybe I can shake up his world with my ultimate goal being to make it so he cannot work with kids.

Holding [edited] (the abuser and predator) accountable in any way I can is important to me. If I can keep one person from limping through their life in pain then that would be worth it. I have been in alot of pain for 23 years. I thought I was a shameful broken person and never made the connections between the horrible feelings of self and the SA. I am so fucking angry at this piece of shit. I am angry at my school system that must have known about him. He got transfered around just like in the Catholic Church. I know the other coaches in town knew because they wouldnt associate with him.

When I was in 9th grade and he was the Junior Varsity basketball coach, he was spotted at a Detroit Pistons basketball game with some of his player and they were drinking beer (this is how he lured me, he used alcohol). I know that his employment file with the school district must be a very dirty one. If I could, I would sue the school system. They let down a lot of kids. I owe the school system nothing.

I just had to get this off my chest. [edited] will go regret the day he prayed on me. I am so much stronger than him. He is going to find out but not soon enough.
 
Robby: my heart goes out to you this is exactly the same situation that happened to my fiance. He too was preyed upon by someone in a position of authority through the sham of an "extracurricular friendship" that also involved alcohol.

As far as criminal liability, although the statute of criminal limitations may have run out, you may have other options. What kind of options do you have through the teachers college of your state? Do you have any civil trial options? Are there any coaching assocations that have some kind of disciplinary committee?

It is difficult but my fiance was in the same situation as you - he felt he had to DO something to acknowledge his pain and help kickstart his own healing and he did launch a complaint through a professional association. It was the most "painless" approach to confrontation as he did not have to see the abuser directly but it was handled through written and phone conversations with an investigator who so far has brokered both sides (complainant and alleged abuser).

The advice given to you by a previous poster was wise - be careful that anythiung you do will keep you safe - should a confronation put you in an unsafe or difficult predicament I am sure that professionals would recommend against it. You've already been through enough.

Keep in mind there are many ways to go through the emotional and psychological "release" of a confontation that dont actually involve direct confrontation - letter writing, role play, rituals (i.e. writing letters and burning them), etc - these have proven to be as effective psychologically as direct confrontation. Anyhow safe to say that confrontation shold definitely be discussed with a professional - its hard to stay focussed when dealing with such difficult and painful emotions.

All rationality aside - I too would love to f***ing spray paint the name of my fiance's abuser all over billboards in the abusers town proclaiming he's a pedophile.. I'd love to post ads in the local papers telling kids to watch out, I'd love to send letters to all parents of kids in his zone of influence... Knowing that this scumbag has been involved with kids in a very influential way for over 20 years now (17 years or so since my fiance's abuse incident) and to know, through the grapevine that some of these other kids think the guy is practically a GOD makes me sick to my stomach. I can only imagine the feelings that you had at that basketball game.

While we may not all get the justice we rightly deserve in this lifetime, I remain firmly convinced that somewhere, sometime, in the afterlife, or the spiritual realm, that your pain will be lifted and people like your abuser will get what he deserves. There HAS to be some kind of cosmic or spiritual righting of wrongs, somewhere, sometime.

P
 
Robby, Roland, Pas,

Excellent advice, Roland, Pas. And, thanks, too, Roland,for showing Robby that article by Ken Singer.
Robby, what youre thinking of doing takes real gutsguts that I havent had until only recently. Know, too, that we have a law enforcement specialist associated with this site, who may be able to help, especially if Xxxx Xxxxx is still, actively, working his evil. Let me know, and I will introduce you to him.

David
 
Roland, PAS, and Ivanhoe

I appreciate your feedback. My post probably seemed very angry. I am very angry. Although I am not looking for a confrontation, at the same time, I am not scared of him either. It is very important to me at this point that there be some level of accountability. However, I will procede with caution!

One fact I left out of my previous post was that when he was at the Detroit Pistons basketball game drinking with his players, he was spotted by someone associated with the school and was fired.

Ivanhoe, I would appreciate you putting me in contact with the law inforcement specialist to explore my options, if I have any.

Thank you for the support!!!!!!!

Rob
 
Originally posted by Robby:
when he was at the Detroit Pistons basketball game drinking with his players, he was spotted by someone associated with the school and was fired.
Click to expand...
Ah.. the magic karma wheel.. spinning in favour of the good guys...

:)

P
 
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