Dream
I had a dream last night that has been on my mind all day. I dreamed that I went to my grandparents house at like 10:00 at night, and they both came to the door in their pajamas. They acted kind of bewildered as to why I was there, and I remember just wanting them to ask me to come in for a while, but they didn't, they just made awkward conversation for a couple of minutes and I could tell they wanted me to leave. Both of them are really already dead (my grandfather in 1989, my grandmother in 1999), but the dream look place in the here and now. In real life, my grandparents lived across the street from my parents house and I grew up from the time I was 6 living across the street from them. But back to the dream....after I was turned away by them, I walked back to my truck which was parked on the street and looked over towards my parents house. I could see my mother through the screen door in the dining room of the house, since the lights were on inside. I was afraid she would see me out there and would want me to come in. So I left. End of dream.
Having written all this out, I now have tears welling up in my eyes, but I don't know why. My grandfather was always polite to me, but not particularly loving or affectionate. My grandmother was a very critical, cynical woman, and was emotional abusive to my mother most of her life. My mother was emotional empty with me as a child, physically neglectful in some aspects. I remember asking my therapist once what he thought of dreams, he didn't seem to think they were particularly relevant.
I don't know. Maybe they're not. But this one has been with me all day.
Having written all this out, I now have tears welling up in my eyes, but I don't know why. My grandfather was always polite to me, but not particularly loving or affectionate. My grandmother was a very critical, cynical woman, and was emotional abusive to my mother most of her life. My mother was emotional empty with me as a child, physically neglectful in some aspects. I remember asking my therapist once what he thought of dreams, he didn't seem to think they were particularly relevant.
I don't know. Maybe they're not. But this one has been with me all day.