don't know what to do

don't know what to do
M

markgreyblue

Registrant
i am angry - it seems people around want me to
think or be what they want me to be -

and now i am furious - cause i am disconnected

i have been having these angry feelings all summer-

i was telling in the chat last night that ocassionally i throw things - by msyelf at my home -

i don't know what to do with the anger - i would have sex - but my boyfriend is at work and this is not the kind of sex i really am ok with -

in a sense i can see being really promiscuous -

but not really what i planned -

and i am just so f----- angry like i want to throw a rock through my window -

any suggestions ???

feel like chocolate cake would help - a ashower helped still angry though
 
Last night I threw things (made a mess) yelled at the cat (terrified her) and ate a whole cake (a small one). Didn't have sex but did work out for about 3 hours with self-punishing intensity.

Didn't feel good about it but these were all a release. Other guys will have ideas about how to use more self-benefitting methods for acheiving relief.
 
thanks brayton - i ended up a little self abusive after all - still angry - feel like i am
wearing friggin footbal shoulder pads and ready for a hit -

i hate biz people who are too friggin needy -
-it's like - get a boyfriend or girfriend --

thanks for your comment -

mgb
 
Hey, football might be a good way to work off the anger.

Seriously, I know how easy it is to turn this stuff/anger against myself. I often have violent fantasies but don't act on them against people or small animals. Objects are fair game I figure at least for the time being.
 
Mark,

I understand what you're saying. I feel that way and I find some ways to deal with it.

If you have the option, find something for a punching bag (believe it or not, they actually sell good quality inflatable punching bags that can be weighed down with water) and beat the living crap out of it. It can help.

I agree that angry sex isn't the best thing either, for you or your partner. Sexual relations should be made out of love, not anger. Brother, do I know that now! :rolleyes:

If all else fails, have that slice (one!) of chocolate cake. Or maybe my comfort sweet of choice, fresh baked chocolate chip cookies. Anything to take the pain away that isn't completely destructive.

Peace and love, bro.

Scot
 
Hello Mark,
I can relate entirely! After medicating for three or four decades the only thing left after alcohol, drugs and brain cells disappeared was the rage, sleeping, but still there to wake up at the slightest nudge. I also wound up spending a lot on broken things and fines brought out by the meds and the rage.

Seems to me you might do well with talking, like you did here, to a therapist and try writing some pissed off letters and file or destroy them. You need to find peace and forgiveness for you and the focus of your rage.

Sincere advice but it only worked partially for me. I finally got castrated in Nov., as a last resort to stop at least the sexual deviate I had become, and wound up in a state that could only be described as Nirvana. While I'm not recommending it for everyone, it worked for me and today I'm totally at peace with who I am and the nightmares behind me.

Get rid of your anger through words, written or spoken, and a slip will come that may reveal an awful lot if you're listening to an inner voice driving the words.

Good luck,
Michael
 
thank you friends these comments are important to me - they are food for thought and a comfort
in knowing that you all have offered them - sorry but it is a joy to know you all are there
giving me advice and knowing that i am not some alien creature -
thank you so much -

mgb
 
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