doctors an tests
doctors an tests
- Thread starterTrevor
- Start date
theo
Registrant
trevor,
i hear you so well. what we have to go through on our journey can be so frustrating at times, the anger and feelings of helplessness...but we are still here, and that counts for so very much. but, trevor, try to remember, no matter the feelings we have at any given moment, being a survivor means we have made a choice to survive. it means that our bodies, mind, and heart do belong to us after all, even when we don't believe it.
i hear you so well. what we have to go through on our journey can be so frustrating at times, the anger and feelings of helplessness...but we are still here, and that counts for so very much. but, trevor, try to remember, no matter the feelings we have at any given moment, being a survivor means we have made a choice to survive. it means that our bodies, mind, and heart do belong to us after all, even when we don't believe it.
roadrunner
Registrant
Trev,
I know how you feel with the medical tests. I was quite ill last month and I had to go to the doctor. I was in pretty bad shape, as I hadn't eaten in five days, and before I knew it I was surrounded by nurses poking and examining without telling me what they were doing. But then the doctor walked in and got rid of them. Why? I had told her on some previous occasion that I was a survivor and that things like this distress me. She had thanked me right on the spot for being so honest with her, and she told me this would help her to help me in the future. She was right! When she saw me with all these nurses trying to get me hooked up for transfusions and so on, she knew how I would be feeling and she acted right away to get rid of these people. She apologized and did all the work herself and I felt a lot better.
If you feel you can, it wouldn't be a bad idea to tell your doctor you are a survivor. You don't need to go into details, and you are old enough that the doctor would have to respect your confidence.
On the feeling that you STILL don't even own your own body, it might help to know that these days physicals sometimes include HIV tests just as a matter of procedure. When I was ill, for example, they took blood samples "for tests", and I know that included HIV, though I didn't bother to ask. The important thing to remember is that the doctor isn't asking for the blood sample for HIV because he suspects you or thinks he knows something. It's just procedure.
But again, if you think you can somehow tell your doctor that you are a survivor, without going into the details, that does help him/her to help you in the future.
Much love,
Larry
I know how you feel with the medical tests. I was quite ill last month and I had to go to the doctor. I was in pretty bad shape, as I hadn't eaten in five days, and before I knew it I was surrounded by nurses poking and examining without telling me what they were doing. But then the doctor walked in and got rid of them. Why? I had told her on some previous occasion that I was a survivor and that things like this distress me. She had thanked me right on the spot for being so honest with her, and she told me this would help her to help me in the future. She was right! When she saw me with all these nurses trying to get me hooked up for transfusions and so on, she knew how I would be feeling and she acted right away to get rid of these people. She apologized and did all the work herself and I felt a lot better.
If you feel you can, it wouldn't be a bad idea to tell your doctor you are a survivor. You don't need to go into details, and you are old enough that the doctor would have to respect your confidence.
On the feeling that you STILL don't even own your own body, it might help to know that these days physicals sometimes include HIV tests just as a matter of procedure. When I was ill, for example, they took blood samples "for tests", and I know that included HIV, though I didn't bother to ask. The important thing to remember is that the doctor isn't asking for the blood sample for HIV because he suspects you or thinks he knows something. It's just procedure.
But again, if you think you can somehow tell your doctor that you are a survivor, without going into the details, that does help him/her to help you in the future.
Much love,
Larry
roadrunner
Registrant
Which would be another form of not owning your body. You - not the anger - should decide what Trevor needs and does.
Anger needs to come out, yes, but it always wants to trick us into wrecking as much as possible along the way. But that takes emotional energy, which we need for other things. And we also NEED those people and things that anger wants to wreck.
Much love,
Larry
Anger needs to come out, yes, but it always wants to trick us into wrecking as much as possible along the way. But that takes emotional energy, which we need for other things. And we also NEED those people and things that anger wants to wreck.
Much love,
Larry
roadrunner
Registrant
I know, I know. 
I'm just on a roll already this morning. I should be totally impossible by this evening. Just watch! 
Much love,
Larry
I'm just on a roll already this morning. I should be totally impossible by this evening. Just watch! Much love,
Larry
roadrunner
Registrant
lol. They already know it's a lost cause. They just have to ride out the storm.
L.
L.
melliferal
Registrant
I understand the flip-side, too. I'm an EMT, and sometimes that involves some physical contact the patients would rather not have. If it's not an emergency, I try to accomodate them - but sometimes you have no choice. A little while back, we got a call for a little boy who'd been hit by a car (the car was trying to drive around a STOPPED ice cream truck. Idiot!). His upper left leg was excessively (to be judicious) swollen. A femur injury can be life-threatening, and we had to cut the kid's jeans off in order to be able to work with his leg. He was embarassed, and I felt really uncomfortable doing that - but it had to be done. 
melliferal
Registrant
My EMT class was one semester long (about four months). The class was twice a week for 5 hours a day.
That's just for the Basic EMT level, though. When I want to move up to Paramedic EMT (which means I get to stick people with needles and give more kinds of drugs, amongst other things), the class lasts for a year.
That's just for the Basic EMT level, though. When I want to move up to Paramedic EMT (which means I get to stick people with needles and give more kinds of drugs, amongst other things), the class lasts for a year.
markgreyblue
Registrant
trev-
i still have trouble expressing anger
in high school i broke my arm - and it hurt
but like i couldn't get angry
my teacher - who walked me to the hospital said
"it's ok to yell or curse" - i tried -
i kind of "acted it" - and then thought
that really didn't do much -
it's ok to have these dark feelings it's just a way of not really hitting the doctor -
but you can say put your foot down if you don't like something -
oh well - anyway- i just got a sense - that you don't yell that your pissed off -
I don't do that enough -
and I began it way too late in life -
i still have trouble expressing anger
in high school i broke my arm - and it hurt
but like i couldn't get angry
my teacher - who walked me to the hospital said
"it's ok to yell or curse" - i tried -
i kind of "acted it" - and then thought
that really didn't do much -
it's ok to have these dark feelings it's just a way of not really hitting the doctor -
but you can say put your foot down if you don't like something -
oh well - anyway- i just got a sense - that you don't yell that your pissed off -
I don't do that enough -
and I began it way too late in life -
roadrunner
Registrant
Trev,
Anger is a complicated subject. It's good to let anger out and survivors have a lot of anger to offload. But it should be anger at what happened to us, and we need to try to express anger in a way that we don't harm others.
It's good you are looking at anger and thinking about it. It's not so much that anger pisses people off. If you came to me and spoke in anger about what was done to you, I would absolutely agree and I would be able to support you in your anger. The problem is that when we just rage against the world in general and yell at other people and break things, we make it more difficult for them to help us. We invite them to get mad too, and then everyone is fucked - both sides are shouting and no one is listening. It's not that it's anyone's fault - it's just that anger can get like this.
When you say you are trying not to piss people off so much anymore, I would say how about changing that just a bit, and say you are trying to make sure that when you get angry you don't hurt people around you.
Much love,
Larry
Anger is a complicated subject. It's good to let anger out and survivors have a lot of anger to offload. But it should be anger at what happened to us, and we need to try to express anger in a way that we don't harm others.
It's good you are looking at anger and thinking about it. It's not so much that anger pisses people off. If you came to me and spoke in anger about what was done to you, I would absolutely agree and I would be able to support you in your anger. The problem is that when we just rage against the world in general and yell at other people and break things, we make it more difficult for them to help us. We invite them to get mad too, and then everyone is fucked - both sides are shouting and no one is listening. It's not that it's anyone's fault - it's just that anger can get like this.
When you say you are trying not to piss people off so much anymore, I would say how about changing that just a bit, and say you are trying to make sure that when you get angry you don't hurt people around you.
Much love,
Larry