discusted

discusted
R

rolling_is_life

Registrant
This place is a GOD DAMN JOKE if u people condone what just happend, im in the chat room lobby, and someone..i won't name names in public. walks in a FUCKING BRAGGS ABOUT PUSHING A MALE STUDENT AGAINST A LOCKER AND FORCING HIM SELF ON HIM AND KISSING HIM. I could NOT belive it. And his excuse: oh, he called me a name, and they make fun of me. THIS IS HOW SEXUAL ABUSERS START. And the moderator kicks me outa the room for yellin at this kid. I am discusted with this entire thing. when other memebers start supporting him. If thats how things run here..its a JOKE
 
hey, keith, that's not how this place works. honestly. i'm sorry you had to go thru that. i haven't been in the chat room yet, and personally i'd like to know why something like that would be condoned. but believe me, keith, that's not the usual way things go here.

i know you're angry right now, but try to calm down, okay? you're right, that is how abuse starts, and it shouldn't have happened, but i really think you need to calm down, for your own sake, okay?

jake
 
agian jake, no offense to you, but calming down and shutting up is how these kind of things go by unotticed and I won't have it. NO way in hell. I can't have had the abuse that I had and sit there and listen to that, and I have learned more on the kids reasoning, but my veiw is still the same.
 
I believe that rolling_is_life's reaction was entirely appropriate. You should be pissed as we all should be. The person that did this should be banned from the site. It sucks that someone early in their recovery would have to experience this at a site that is dedicated to recovery.
 
To all,

We will be checking the transcripts and speaking with our moderators to verify the facts of this incident. Abusive behavior is NOT tolerated on this board or in the chat room.
 
ADMINISTRATORS:

Early Wednesday morning, sometime between 1 & 3 am, there was another incident in the chat room lobby which was uncomfortable and should be addressed.

It was between two members who I hadn't seen there before and I had the distinct impression, from their converstaion, that they are rather young - teens or early 20's.

That incident involved using a very negative word to describe the possible sexual orientation of a perpetrator. The word was immediately apologized for by the person who used it, and no one called them to task for using it, but if I recall correctly, it was used at least one more time in the next few minutes.

I happen to agree with Keith, in principle, but I guess his reactions got a bit intense.

KEITH:
Next time, let the moderator know what's going on. You can messge them privately - they may have been in another room and not aware of what was being said.

I'm not saying to keep silent. I think you did the right thing in speaking out against what you describe hearing. But you have to remember that your words have power and impact too. And the moderator who removed you is another human being who may have been as upset and angry by how you spoke as you were by what you heard.

As you can see, there are transcripts, and you can email the admins to look them over and they will do the right thing.

I hope you won't let this incident keep you from the chat room or these forums. Both are excellent. They are not a joke, they are very serious and quite remarkable. Some of the recent posts and "conversations" here have been amazingly astute, powerful, sometimes provoking, and very healing.

There will be conflict and disagreement, but part of what we must do is learn to handle both in ways that do not make them worse.

I welcome you here, although I am sorry you belong to this group. And I hope you stay. We need you.

Donald
 
:mad:
Hi Keith,

I am saddened and angered that the stuff that happened to you happened at all. You are a gutsy young man, dealing with something no one should ever have to deal with.

It is unfortunate that anyone here would talk about exploiting another guy and/or brag about it. We want you to be veery safe here. We want you to be able to vent the rage you are feeling for what was done to you.

Are there moerators on the chat room at the wee hours of the morning? Maybe some west coast guys who stay up late out there could be moderators at these odd times.

When I am struggling with terror I am unable to sleep. I can see how guys would come here at all hours.

I am really sorry that happened to you Keith. We love and respect you and want you too be an integral part of us.

Bob
 
Things have changed a GREAT deal after that incedent. Me and the other person made out peace. And are talking regularly now. I dissagree with his actions, but do know WHY he did them and am compassionate to those reasons. No actions are nessicary I think.

-Keith
 
haha i made a weird typo..we made OUR peace..just thought id correct it
 
Well done, Keith.

I think we all have similar reactions: we get mad, we yell and scream, maybe, but the important thing is to try to minimize the hurt. Talking does that, community does that, shared experience does that.

I join the chorus of voices and welcome you here. I also share their sadness that you should have to be here at all.

Peace to all of us
 
Nice one Keith, it's a strong man who makes peace.

Lloydy
 
:D me and him are not just getting along now, were becoming good friends as well, so I lost a lost a enemy and gained a friend. So im very happy with the way things turned out :p
 
Well done Keith. I am glad for you.

Ken
 
((((rolling))))

((((LC)))))

You guys rock
 
Man the way this has processed and turned out is gratifying to see! It shows the that the power of people talking and working together to understand each other can be stronger than the conflicts & misunderstanding we're bound to have becuz we're all human & we're all different.

It also gives me hope. I've largely avoided chat rooms for a while tho I used to go quite a bit, on other sites, a while back. It was in big part becuz of conflicts in the chat rooms. Discussion boards are easier to control and safer in many ways. So I've been there more. Will probably continue to be. But maybe I'll try some chat too.

Keith, I'm glad you and this other person have made your peace and are becoming good friends! That's good for both of you, and all of us.
:)
Again I gotta say you show your maturity (and so does your friend) in venting your anger and resolving it so quickly the way you did. Very healthy too, and great to see.
:cool:
Blessed are the peacemakers...

Wuame
 
This is why I remain optimistic that everything in the world is going to work out just fine in the long run. It may take generations still, but good generally seems to prevail. Excellent work you guys! I bet it all started with a simple conversation.
 
glad it all worked out

remember you guys we all hurt

feelings were pushed down

memories faded or gone

some memories too vivid and burn our eyes

abuse sucks

no way around it

I am glad I have guys like you

to help with all these emotions and feelings

MJ
 
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