Different PTSD

My military rape and combat PTSD is so different from the CSA. Because I was older and remember everything. I have been in treatment specifically for those for the last three years. A lot of the treatment bleeds over, but there are stark differences. My T tells me it is because of my older age and really different experiences.

The worst part of this is suddenly getting scared and panicking when the flashbacks come. I am able to generally deal with many of the symptoms due to previous CSA therapy, but this is really different. Body memories are more intense. And combat panic comes back. When you are being under attack and panicked that it could be the end. That I feel like I can be killed.

More work. And not fun. At all.
Hi Jaxson

I am sure you are right there I would agree. My trauma's very and happened over a long period of time could be unto 26 years. Started with a dog attack at 3 1/2 years old, sexual abuse started soon after, As a 13 year old I met the most violent man I ever knew and he attacked me for 5 years, at 17 I was gang raped at 20 and 21 I had 2 major accidence with bad head injuries, Then at 22 I was raped while past out, then over the next 6 years or so; An engine room fire at sea multiple hurricanes at sea.

I was diagnosed with PTSD in the nineties that was change to cPTSD 2 to 3 years ago now. As I have been trying to get help I have run into many problems because there are so many incidences over a long period of time and there is a difference between them and my Psychologist tells me they need to be compartmentalized before we can deal with them as they cause different damages and you need to deal with them one at a time an like with like. He told me there is a lot of difference between CSA and ASA as well there is a big difference between them and the violence that I experienced.

They are all different and hurt in different ways. I found through EMDR I found out what my night terrors where about the were a motorcycle accident and the sudden impacted as I hit the front of a car. I don't get that from any of the other trauma's.

Thank for the topic. it is how I have felt for a long time
Take care

Healing light

I agree different traumas at different ages have different effects

The death of my little brother to sids effects me different to the CSA that was happening at the time. I feel extremely anxious if I see anything draped on a pram and I never put my son in one I carryed him everywhere till he could walk

The ASA again effects me differently my memory is more precise , less confused , the deep depresions after and suicide attempts. The ocds , and binge drinking , self loathing were all horrible

The fear of being killed is something I struggle with , in a different way I expect to veterans
With different triggers and feelings resulting in similar symptoms and cptsd

I wish you peace in your journey of healing

I talked to my shrink yesterday about cPTSD and he told me he knew I had it, but never mentioned it. Because we were dealing with other things at the time.
Over the years we have come to understand that we must separate the two issues in our conversations here at MS. The abuse, and the military trauma. We have made the mistake of talking about the things we have done and experienced overseas and found that where we have never been "shut down" or anything like that, others can not relate. We try not to mix the two, although obviously, we fail frequently. In our mind, they are all related, one common thread. It is impossible to separate them in our mind but we try to be conscious of the way such things are received. Perhaps this is an opsec measure at its core. Perhaps it is an understanding of what others come here for. Perhaps it is the words of the VA who have made it abundantly clear that they don't care about the other issues although again, in our mind its all connected. This is frustrating on some level for us. Alas, it seems to be the way it is. We try our best not to wander too much before we see it and shut it down if we can. We hope you are having some luck in dealing with both issues. Be well sir
Actually, it was the VA that helped me through the csa trauma to the point that I am on the other side of it. We are now working on the MST and the combat trauma.