DID - Dissociative Identity Disorder - how many of us have it??
Dissociative Identity Disorder - used to be called "Multiple Personality Disorder" - This has been popularized by Hollywood, especially Soap Operas for dramatic purposes.
Going though T over the years, I discovered I do, indeed have some form of it. Reading more about it, it is almost always caused by severe abuse as a child. When the abuse happens, our personality "splits" so that our conscious mind can be numb from the abuse while another portion takes on the abuse, then hides it away.
One T described it like a glass marble that is thrown to the ground so hard, it shatters, but remains intact. You can clearly see the fracturing throughout.
This is why many of us have suppressed memories. I call that portion of mine the "Vault Keeper" - He has all of those painful secrets locked up in a vault, inaccessible from conscious memory. However it is an imperfect system, as the contents within the vault occasionally leak out in different ways in our conscious mind, interrupting our lives & thoughts.
It took a lot of therapy to convince him that I was in a safe space and it was alright to unlock that vault, the one that contained the memories of my perp-father abusing me when I was 3. I now have pretty clear recollection of what happened.
There are others as well. I think many of us, the "fracture" of our personalities are more subtle. We may not even realize it when they take over. I spoke this morning of the "Scared Little Boy" part of my personality that was very scared about me going to a new support group tonight with MEN I do not know. Once he "took over" this morning, I could not stop crying.
I also have a "Warrior" side - when I see injustice happening, he takes over and boldly fights for others.
There are others, too - but they all, except Vault Keeper, reside in different parts of the conscious - so that all actions taken by these "facets" are still remembered.
Others (as often dramatized by Hollywood) have more extreme personality "Breaks" that actually Take Over - and the main personality has no memory of what happens during those times. I have met people who have this type. Some "alters" are different ages and different developmental stages (where they FORGET skills and other things that had been learned by older alters).
Some even have active 2 or more alters, "battling" or co-existing in the consciousness.
My next battle, I do not know if it is the same Vault Keeper or a 2nd Vault Keeper - I experienced some type of trauma during 1st grade. I always remember NOT remembering 1st grade - very weird. I remember a lot before and after and a few small events during, but overall, it is a black hole!! Whatever happened, it is still tightly locked up!! How it leaks into my life, I do not know since I have no inkling what happened.
How many of us here have DID?? Probably a lot!! If you have "holes" in your memory, you probably do! Something to discuss with your T!!
Going though T over the years, I discovered I do, indeed have some form of it. Reading more about it, it is almost always caused by severe abuse as a child. When the abuse happens, our personality "splits" so that our conscious mind can be numb from the abuse while another portion takes on the abuse, then hides it away.
One T described it like a glass marble that is thrown to the ground so hard, it shatters, but remains intact. You can clearly see the fracturing throughout.
This is why many of us have suppressed memories. I call that portion of mine the "Vault Keeper" - He has all of those painful secrets locked up in a vault, inaccessible from conscious memory. However it is an imperfect system, as the contents within the vault occasionally leak out in different ways in our conscious mind, interrupting our lives & thoughts.
It took a lot of therapy to convince him that I was in a safe space and it was alright to unlock that vault, the one that contained the memories of my perp-father abusing me when I was 3. I now have pretty clear recollection of what happened.
There are others as well. I think many of us, the "fracture" of our personalities are more subtle. We may not even realize it when they take over. I spoke this morning of the "Scared Little Boy" part of my personality that was very scared about me going to a new support group tonight with MEN I do not know. Once he "took over" this morning, I could not stop crying.
I also have a "Warrior" side - when I see injustice happening, he takes over and boldly fights for others.
There are others, too - but they all, except Vault Keeper, reside in different parts of the conscious - so that all actions taken by these "facets" are still remembered.
Others (as often dramatized by Hollywood) have more extreme personality "Breaks" that actually Take Over - and the main personality has no memory of what happens during those times. I have met people who have this type. Some "alters" are different ages and different developmental stages (where they FORGET skills and other things that had been learned by older alters).
Some even have active 2 or more alters, "battling" or co-existing in the consciousness.
My next battle, I do not know if it is the same Vault Keeper or a 2nd Vault Keeper - I experienced some type of trauma during 1st grade. I always remember NOT remembering 1st grade - very weird. I remember a lot before and after and a few small events during, but overall, it is a black hole!! Whatever happened, it is still tightly locked up!! How it leaks into my life, I do not know since I have no inkling what happened.
How many of us here have DID?? Probably a lot!! If you have "holes" in your memory, you probably do! Something to discuss with your T!!