Did anyone see the Montel Williams Show today 2/6/03

Did anyone see the Montel Williams Show today 2/6/03
C

Chey-Wy

Registrant
Did anyone see todays Montel Williams show. Unfortunately I only caught the very end of the show. Todays show was called Lost innnocence.

LOST INNOCENCE

When a child is thrown into a life of abuse, time goes by, but their
painful memories never fade. Often a child molester gets off with
a minimum prison sentence, but it's their victims who pay the
ultimate price - a life of pain. Montel's guests know that pain too
well they are three brothers who were each molested by their
father. As adults they struggle to conduct "normal" lives but
they'll describe the difficulties they encounter each and every
day.
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https://www.montelshow.com/show/past_detail_1_6_2003.htm

Let me know if anyone caught the show. Also, at the end of the show was a contact number for RAINN. I wish they would have also given a link to Male Survivor.

If anyone saw the entire show I would like to know what you thought about it.

John
 
I saw the preview of it yesterday. Was in an interview so i missed it today, and of course the VCR is broke. I am checking with a few friends to see if they recorded his show, the used to all the time. I will let you know.


Geo
 
Hi LightFang; Hey Geo. I did not see the show but would be very interested in hearing more about the contents of the show. Would be good to find out if they plan to re-air the show and if at some future re-broadcast they would include web sites for MS:NOMSV and other survivor sites. Please, guys, keep us posted.

Jess.
 
Hey guys

I did find a "contact us" on the websight and sent them an e-mail. I did get an 800# for transcripts. I am going to call and see how much one would be.

I don't know if he would do a rebroadcast of the show .... but he might do a story of other survivors.

Maybe that is an idea for a poll.

Would you be willing to go on a T V show like Montel Williams and tell you story?

He has CLASS and would handle the situation with the respect it deserves. I would never do it on one of the "Trash T V shows"
 
John, that's a really good idea, and I'd be willing to do it too!

Victor
 
Chey-wy

You ask an interesting question as to whether we as survivors would go on T.V. to tell our stories.

I live in the U.K. and was asked whether I would appear in a similar programme. (For English readers of these forums it was Kilroy). The programme was more directed too adult, male survivors of rape.

My therapist, knowing I had bought up the subject previously asked if I would cosider accompanying her. She was to be 'the expert'. My initial reaction was a very definate yes. I wont go over the details of my rape/abuse, as I have mentiond it several times before on this site and don't want to bore you all. Suffice to say, it would have been difficult for the doubters and the 'he must be gay' brigade to deny my rape.

Having talked it through with my therapist I decided to decline. As she pointed out, how would I cope when I got those sideways glances whilst doing everyday chores, (grocery shopping etc). Is it appropriate that my nephews and nieces know? They range from 3 to 22. Whilst I have spoken/do speak openly with regard to my abuse/rapes, it's on my terms. I have done talks to counselling trainees etc, but I dictate to whom I tell.

I did feel guilty turning her down. I suppose I felt I had let my fellow survivors down, but I had to keep myself safe.

Thanks again for asking an interesting question.

Mark
 
I live in the U.K. and was asked whether I would appear in a similar programme. (For English readers of these forums it was Kilroy). The programme was more directed too adult, male survivors of rape.

Having talked it through with my therapist I decided to decline. As she pointed out, how would I cope when I got those sideways glances whilst doing everyday chores, (grocery shopping etc). Is it appropriate that my nephews and nieces know? They range from 3 to 22. Whilst I have spoken/do speak openly with regard to my abuse/rapes, it's on my terms. I have done talks to counselling trainees etc, but I dictate to whom I tell.

I did feel guilty turning her down. I suppose I felt I had let my fellow survivors down, but I had to keep myself safe.

Mark
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Mark, my brother, you definitely did not let your fellow survivors down. Had you not kept yourself safe, you would have let yourself down, and then perhaps your fellow survivors too. You are sharing your story on your terms and that is not only courageous, IMNSHO it is the most courageous way to do it! Thanks for the inspiration, Mark!
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Victor
 
Mark,

I guess before I did anything I would want to talk to my T and my attorney. I did talk to my attorney today about where things were at with my case. He seems a little concerned. It seems that in the records that the church has requested I mentioned to one of my T's about ten years ago that I was considering taking legal action against the church. This is in my psychological file. I did contact an attorney at that time ... he was a member of the church ... and he refused to take the case because of a conflict of interest.

My current attorney is concerned that the church will use that to say that the statute of limitations has run out.

As she pointed out, how would I cope when I got those sideways glances whilst doing everyday chores, (grocery shopping etc).
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I guess I don't care anymore who knows what happened to me. I have finally come to the conclusion that I did nothing wrong. My perps and the church are the ones that should feel guilty. If going on national T V is what it takes to get the church to wake up and take responsibilty for what the BASTARD did to me ... then that is what I am willing to to.
 
Chey-wy

I admire your courage.

I guess I don't care anymore who knows what happened to me. I have finally come to the conclusion that I did nothing wrong. My perps and the church are the ones that should feel guilty. If going on national T V is what it takes to get the church to wake up and take responsibilty for what the BASTARD did to me ... then that is what I am willing to to.
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Most of the time I feel as you do. It's just those times when I'm feeling vulnerable that the odd sideways glance could send me on a downward spiral.

It is such a big step to go on national/international T.V. The dilema for me is the want to expose that this abuse happens in a hospital 'caring' environment whilst the need to keep myself safe. I'm not saying that I will never find the courage to talk openly on T.V. just that I'm aware it's not the right time for me, once I appeared there would be no going back.

Once again I admire your courage and wish you luck for the future.

Mark
 
I guess before I did anything I would want to talk to my T and my attorney. I did talk to my attorney today about where things were at with my case. He seems a little concerned. It seems that in the records that the church has requested I mentioned to one of my T's about ten years ago that I was considering taking legal action against the church. This is in my psychological file. I did contact an attorney at that time ... he was a member of the church ... and he refused to take the case because of a conflict of interest.

My current attorney is concerned that the church will use that to say that the statute of limitations has run out.
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John I'm so sorry that you are still having so much trouble with what as my little mind sees it should be and open & shut case!

There's no statute of limitation on how long & how much we suffer becuz of our perps! Why in hell's bathroom is there one that keeps us from prosecuting them so we can get som damn closure?!
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I guess I don't care anymore who knows what happened to me. I have finally come to the conclusion that I did nothing wrong. My perps and the church are the ones that should feel guilty. If going on national T V is what it takes to get the church to wake up and take responsibilty for what the BASTARD did to me ... then that is what I am willing to to.
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John, while I respect & support those like Mark who are not ready to take this particular kind of step in disclosure, having been so very very recently there myself, I say ditto to you! Like yourself...

"I Don't Care Anymore"

Well you can tell ev'ryone I'm a down disgrace
Drag my name all over the place.
I don't care anymore.
You can tell ev'rybody 'bout the state I'm in
You won't catch me crying 'cos I just can't win.
I don't care anymore I don't care anymore

I don't care what you say
I don't play the same games you play.

'Cos I've been talking to the people that you call your friends
And it seems to me there's a means to and end.
They don't care anymore.
And as for me I can sit here and bide my time
I got nothing to lose if I speak my mind.
I don't care anymore I don't care no more

I don't care what you say
We never played by the same rules anyway.

I won't be there anymore
Get out of my way
Let me by
I got better things to do with my time
I don't care anymore I don't care anymore
I don't care anymore I don't care anymore

Well, I don't care now what you say
'Cos ev'ry day I'm feeling fine with myself
And I don't care now what you say
Hey I'll do alright by myself
'Cos I know.

'Cos I remember all the times I tried so hard
And you laughed in my face 'cos you held all the cards.
I don't care anymore.
And I really ain't bothered what you think of me
'Cos all I want of you is just a let me be.
I don't care anymore D'you hear? I don't care no more

I don't care what you say
I never did believe you much anyway.

I won't be there no more
So get out of my way.
Let me by
I got better things to do with my time
I don't care anymore
D'you hear? I don't care anymore
I don't care no more
You listening? I don't care no more
No more!

You know I don't care no more!

No more no more No more no more No more no more...

(by Phil Collins)

While I'm no big fan of basketball coach Bobby Knight, these words of his, which I'll slightly paraphrase, do now come to mind:

"I hope that when I die I'm buried upside down, so all my perps can kiss my
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But then, that's far more than they deserve...
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Victor
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Found this link by Ken Singer. I found this Article very interesting.

https://www.malesurvivor.org/articles/singer3.htm

Thanks Ken.

Mark
 
Hi Guys,
I saw the show from start to finish. I thought it was about time one of these talk shows did a story on boys being abused, they do lots of abuse stories but it's mostly about girls. Watching that show was very painful for me. It brought up so many feelings, hate, anger, discuss, pain, just a ton of them. The three brothers that was on the show was very brave. I about feel out of my chair when they said the father got 11 months for his first conviction and then when he got out he got a girl friend to regester as a foster care provider and then had contact with one of his boys and talked him into acting out so bad that he got placed with this girlfriend and the cps services did nothing to follow up or anything on it. The oldest brother knew about this and he didnt give up untill he found someone to fix the problem and get his brother out of there. How betraid must he have felt, first by his father then by the very system telling him it's ok your safe now.........and them bam they put him in a home that his abuser lives in.......then he talked about how he was scared to change his daughters diper or bath one of he other children, he always leaves the door open so he's not in a place that he could even be accused of doing anything or a place where he could....how sad :o (.........as far as going on tv? HELL YES I WOULD......if telling my story would help just one boy that is liveing in the place I grew up in...........THATS AN EASY QUESTION....there is no question to ask
well thanks for letting me talk
joker
 
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