Depression Returns

[bobs]

I haven't posted here all that often. I guess it is because I have been doing a lot better lately. I went to MN this past weekend and had a great time. Met a lot of new friends that will hopefuly be lifelong friends.
Unfortunately, the weekend ended too soon. Now that I am back home the depression has returned in full force. I have no energy, ambition or desire to do anything. Why can I be on such a high one day and on such a low the next? I don't know how to pull myself out of this one. If it doesn't happen soon I don't know what will happen. The last time I was this low I ended up in the hospital for 5 weeks on suicide watch. I like to think that I am past that but it still scares me sometimes.
If anybody has any suggestions about how to get out of a deeply depressed mood I would be greatful
Thanks
Bob

 

[Stephen_5]

Bob,

I recently ran away from home. I left for a dream vacation that lasted 3 weeks. I saw things that I had always wanted to see. I ran away from the reality of my life. When I came home reality was still there.

I have survived so many things in my life. If someone would have told me that I was even capable of surviving all of the things that have happened to me in the last year and a half I wouldn't have believed them for a second. I survived an motorcycle accident. I survived my father's death. I survived a mini-stroke. I survived cancer surgery. I survived another cancer surgery where a chunk of my tongue and mouth were removed. I survived radiation treatments. I survived losing 1/3 of my body mass. I survived the death of my wife of 33 years. I don't know how I did it. Someone asked me that a month or so ago and all I could think of saying was "It was much better than the alternative."

We are all here because we are survivors. We made it this far. We know that there are challenges ahead. I know that things will get better given enough time.

I'm rambling a bit here but what I want to say is that when you've had such a fantastic experience such as being with a supportive group of fellow survivors the reality of returning to your normal surroundings is such a disparity. I'm just now starting to pull out of the depression that I fell into when I returned home 2 weeks ago. I've got an appointment with my therapist and I've started going to a bereavement support group once a week. I'm going to talk with my physician about starting anti-depressants again. I know that things will get better. I hope that things will get better for you too.

Take good care of yourself,

Steve

 

[Mike Church]

Bob: Deep depression. Wow!! Well it has taken me a long time to work out a simple thing to yank me out of it.

I have found that hard physical activity takes my mind off stuff and actually makes me feel good. I joined a health club in January and work my ass off 3-4 times a week. I also inline skate and mountainbike.

Every time I feel a pit coming on away I go. I can recogize them coming now.

Just a suggestion. I know that when the depression gets too much I cant do anything and I can now avoid that trap.