Dealing with Perp # 2

Dealing with Perp # 2

Muldoon

Registrant
Dealing with Perp # 2

Well I spent last Wed. up in Hastings dealing with the issue of my 2nd perp, my freshman English Teacher. I was 14 in the fall of 1964, was felling really good about getting away from Father Ryan at G.A. I was starting a new school and this was going to be a great time in my life. Well the first few weeks where until that day Mr. S. made me one of his victims.

One day he got me in the corner of the room started groping me, as I tried to get away he put his other hand around my neck and put me in a choke hold.
"I am going to do this Tom if you want it or not" he said as he continued to choke me. I froze and he did his evil on me. I transfered out of his class and told my guidance councilor why but nothing happened.

That year was hell for me, because Mr. S. began to stalk me during the school day, showing up at my locker between classes or waiting for the period to end out side my classroom then following me to my next class. All the time acting like he was my best friend. When I joined drama club he started showing up there also. I was a Lighting Tec and was running the spotlight during rehearsal. He came up into the booth and when I was busy following the actor he started foundling me. I blew up in front of everyone yelled at him "leave me alone fagot and get the fuck out of here". That stopped 6 months of abuse but now ever one in drama club knew.

Years later the school sent MR S to the Mayo Clinic for treatment during the summer. Then in 1970 more than 10 victims came forward over a 3 months period. For some reason the school supernatant just let the abuse continue, he would tell the victims not to tell anyone about what happened. "We are working on it" they would say
That just blows my mind that the school would let victim after victim come forward and not stop the evil.
One day they had all the victims leave school and go downtown to the schools lawyers office to give their stories. Well Mr. S. heard about what was going down, went home, borrowed a gun from his neighbor and committed suicide. How nice it was for the school not to have to deal with this any more. Six years and how many more victims after he raped me did it all ended. Found out that my cousin was 1 of his victims in 1970.

Wednesday I went to talk with the school and the police dept to get info. The police said they dont keep records that far back unless it was a very serious crime.
"What about child sexual abuse" I asked "We do that now but back in 1970 it wasnt considered a serious Crime. We wouldn't have any records " the lady behind the window said.
No one gave a shit about the children back then. I got so angry I was near out of control when I left the government center. I did leave though, in the past I would have vented my anger on the worker behind the window.

No personel records on MR S at school either, only have to keep them 7 years. I can go through the school board minutes when I have time. I did have a good conversation with the supper and he asked why I was coming forward now. I told him about Father Ryan being my 1st perp and how I have been healing from that abuse. It was time now to deal with MR S.

I am so mad about how they didnt stop it after the 1st victim came forward in 1970. Mr. S was known as a sexual perp, who had been to the best treatment center in the country for sexual abuse and there was now new victims coming forward. Why didnt it stop?

As I look back on this, the only possible reason the abuse didnt stop was that the school wanted Mr. S to be backed into the deepest and darkest part of his world. The only way out for him was to put that gun to his head. The school didn't care about protecting the children, the only thing on their agenda was getting ride of Mr, S.and who cared how many boys had to be abuse.

I was hopen that I wouldn,t have to do war againest the school but when my uncle told me what happened in 1970 it tore me apart. No one worried about the victims.

The paper listed Mr. S. death as an accident, that's what the police report showed. That makes me think that the police where covering things up also. No help for the victims, just a neat little end to this for the school.
Muldoon
 
God, that's frustrating.

I'm sorry that even your attempts to work this through years later are being blocked.

At least you managed to get through it without being the one at the end of the pistol. Too many kids take that way out of the shame and pain.

In California, several attempts are being made to protect kids from abuse. A lot of it, though, is directed at the social service agencies, rather than proactively protecting BEFORE kids get abused. As a child care worker within the oft-maligned Orange County system, it's sad that the aggressive efforts are against one of the better systems. Maybe I'm biased because the agency I worked for was among the best.

I share your frustration, Muldoon. Don't give up, though.

We're in this together.

Jeremy
 
Thanks Jeremy
I think I should move this to the new forum because there are too many triggers in this. Just an update for here, Mr S offed himself on May 15 1971,not 70 as I throught, and there are no records of sexual abuse because they don,t have to keep those records more than 10 years. Also the police report list the death as " Fatal acidental gun shot" Don,t know how they got away saying that ,but they did.
Muldoon
 
Muldoon
I know this post is running in both forums - and that's ok, I just thought I would post here.

I've just skimmed through a lot of posts recently, not much time etc, but when I read your post properly it hit me how close our experiences were.

In 1964 or 5 my rape by a gang of older boys at boarding school became known to the headmaster, I told him the story and named names on the day it happened.

The result ? he covered up to protect the 'good' name of the schoool, they got away with it and I was then 'available' for the gang to use any way they wanted. A teacher who found out about the incident then joined the gang as the leader.
So for the next 4 years I was abused almost daily during term time.

I had told the most powerful person in my world, and he did fuck all !!

That betrayal is worse than the abuse to me, I hate him, although he died any years ago, more than the older boys and the teacher, also dead.

The two things this left me with was the sexual confusion and disfunction that I have more or less dealt with ( I still have bad days ) and a rage against him that I don't know how to resolve.

The deaths of these adults have left me in a limbo, I have nowhere to direct the rage, and I guess you must feel the same about the teacher who killed himself.
We're recovering and need to deal with our anger, but they're not there to recieve it anymore.
I suppose it's a feeling of frustration that they will never know what they did, although yours must have had some idea as he took his own life.

For all our talk of forgiveness, there's still a satisfaction in knowing they died feeling guilty.

Dave
 
Dave I can not begin to understand how much pain you have had to put up with during those 4years of your life. I have dealt with my pain by hidding it for so long,now is the time to bring it out into the light of day. When Mr. S. killed himself on May 15 1971 I was 21YO and put the whole thing behide me. I had much shame about not having stopped him during those 7 years between 64-71.
The whole thing came rushing to the top this last summer when I was talking with my uncle about Father Ryan, he told me about his son being one of Mr. S. victims in 1970-71. What is realy buring me up right now is that the school super could of stopped it after the 1st victim came forward in the fall of 70. Mr. S. had been to the Mayo Clinic for sexual abuse treatment the summer of 1970 paid for by the school.
I have to hold the school super responible for his action, he knew and should of stopped it 8 months before it all ended. My wife doesn,t understand why I am dealing with this now Mr. S. is dead, but there is no way I can let this hid in the darkness. The school super keep the children in harms way and he didn,t give a dam about the victims.I want the school to understand how evil they where.and how much harm they have done to all the victims.
At the very lest it will bring the issue of child sexual abuse out in the open and everyone should have a better understanding of this issue.
Tom
 
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