counselling really helping...
Hi all - just to let you know that for once, I'm enjoying a period of relative peace in the relationship. My BF has been going to a really good therapist for about 2 months (weekly appointment) and the results have been really amazing.
Part of the therapy involved "anger management" - what was the hardest thing to take in the relationship was his volatile and explosive anger and how it just "took over" so often. My BF and his therapist and him explored the emotion of "anger" and they realized that getting angry was blocking all the emotions that he had been repressing for a long time.
He's finally learning to grieve, to feel, to cry, and be somewhat vulnerable - with me anyways. Its made a huge world of difference just for him to acknowledge what's going on. It has really taken the "edge" off so that he's not always at the breaking point.
At least now he has the ability to often times STATE what is happening and just back away, rather than just blowing up at me. It has made a WORLD of difference in our relationship and finally, I feel that for once, I am not the cause of his problems but rather, an innocent bystander. It has relieved a huge weight off my shoulders and things are going quite well.
I'm glad I stood up for myself when things were going really wrong - I had had it a few months ago and told him that "although I too have my issues, I am no longer going to be your victim". That seemed to make a big difference. I'm glad he is back in therapy. Its pretty evident that he really wants to stop living his life the way he has been living it so far.
soc
Part of the therapy involved "anger management" - what was the hardest thing to take in the relationship was his volatile and explosive anger and how it just "took over" so often. My BF and his therapist and him explored the emotion of "anger" and they realized that getting angry was blocking all the emotions that he had been repressing for a long time.
He's finally learning to grieve, to feel, to cry, and be somewhat vulnerable - with me anyways. Its made a huge world of difference just for him to acknowledge what's going on. It has really taken the "edge" off so that he's not always at the breaking point.
At least now he has the ability to often times STATE what is happening and just back away, rather than just blowing up at me. It has made a WORLD of difference in our relationship and finally, I feel that for once, I am not the cause of his problems but rather, an innocent bystander. It has relieved a huge weight off my shoulders and things are going quite well.
I'm glad I stood up for myself when things were going really wrong - I had had it a few months ago and told him that "although I too have my issues, I am no longer going to be your victim". That seemed to make a big difference. I'm glad he is back in therapy. Its pretty evident that he really wants to stop living his life the way he has been living it so far.
soc
