Civil action against pedophile?

[Z0RN]

Hey guys,
I've been considering suing my perpetrator for quite a while now. From what I gather the country I live in there is no statute of limitations for child sex abuse and I could probably get, bare minimum 150-200k out of it. I've definetly suffered a lot through the years because of what happened. Just recently I've actually gotten help from what my therapist and doctor think is ptsd. I ended up needing to take 6 months off work to recover enough to where I was back to "normal". Even now I need to take medication for it and am still working hard to repair my life to where I want to be.
My question is, would it be beneficial to dredge everything back up and sue for damages? Or just let bygones be bygones and continue getting on with my life. He was charged criminally about 10 years ago and recived 2 years house arrest plus 2 years probation for molesting me and my sister repeatedly for years. Anyone with experience in this would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks

 

[Severe stammer]

Hello Zorn
I was abused by multiple people in my childhood and it would kill me to go to court , I found the courage to put pen to paper and even write it on facebook about my childhood abuse and adult abuse and been jailed for being angry , ive lost everything for being honest , my children my home my wife my business my friends my family who I was never close to .
My adult life has been a living nightmare aswell I also live with a severe stammer .
Do you think the money will change your heartache , money dosent bring happiness believe me ive been rich .
I understand you want revenge I wanted revenge I felt dirty and worthless miss understood no compassion treated like a liar , the abusers denying there revolting actions , making you an outcast .
Are you healing , you took a lot of courage to stand up and take your child abuser to court .
If you feel the money will help you go for it .
Ive got nothing more to prove ,ive laid my cards on the table and was laughed at and ridiculed but it didn't kill me and im getting the right help now .
I live quite a solitary life now very little trust in people but im learning to live , I don't need to feel worthless anymore .
How will your sister be with you taking your abuser to court for financial gain , you have to think about secondary trauma .
Love and peace
Take care x

 

[Bluedogone]

Hi Zorn,

I'm sorry you've had all the after effects of the abuse when the perp has basically paid a very, very small price for the damage he did to you and your sister. Being angry and wanting to at least get something out of all this is certainly understandable. No amount of money would ever repay you, but if you collect, it would at least validate your pain and suffering.

I have no experience in that area, but I have sought damages in a business related civil suit. Testifying in court, facing the false allegations of the cross examination by his attorney were filled with anxiety for me. Getting the decision by the jury was a real victory, but I feel it was the only one. Having a judgement meant nothing because I finally gave up on trying to collect anything. It was impossible to get any of his assets.

It sounds as if you have a great case, and you certainly deserve compensation. Best wishes and good luck if you decide to pursue, but please be aware of what you will be in for.

CJ

 

[Z0RN]

Alright, thanks for the replies guys. I'm still pretty undecided, but there's really no rush either. And severe stammer- how it might effect my sister is definitely something I didn't really consider up until now, thanks.

 

[Vadrian]

Since he was already criminally convicted (but didn't even go to jail) and you are disabled with PTSD over it, it sounds like you have a really solid case. Your abuser certainly owes you and your sister compensation, and given the fact that he'd likely lose, may even just settle out of court. If one of my abusers was wealthy, I'd definitely sue for civil damages.

 

[don64]

These days I generally ask myself "Why would I want to invite that kind of energy back into my life?" with these kind of issues.

Sending you love and support,

Don

 

[ratherbfishing]

I too, have been considering civil action and was hoping to connect with someone that has been through the process. My perp has just recently been charged and He has not been convicted, yet. The crown attorny that I am dealing with has suggested seeking compensation from the Canadian criminal injuries compensation board (https://www.cicb.gov.on.ca/en/faq.htm). The awards are not as high as a civil suit but this might be an alternative.

 

[KMCINVA]

Zorn

Only you can figure out what is right for you. You have seen your abuser charged and found guilty in criminal court. That ordeal must have been difficult. If you feel strong enough, believe the civil action will bring you further peace than your answer should be simple. Only you can decide if you are ready and able to move forward.

If you decide not to pursue, remember you are not letting bygones be bygones but rather doing what you think is right for you--you are in control of the decision.

My abuse occurred in a state with the statute of limitations and all criminal and civil options are closed. Have explored and talked with legal professional and through them other victims. We have not pursued due to the nature of the process and the emotional impact and stresses it may have on other survivors of the abuser.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the best because you will be doing what is right for you.

Kevin

 

[jas4159]

Hello zorn,

Tough call, I had the opportunity to sue my abusers but decided against it. At the time I decided it would not help my recovery and would be to much on me. Now years later, now that i am in a very good place with my recovery, I think i would but the opportunity is gone.

From what others have told me it is no picnic suing for CSA. There has to be clear evidence of the abuse with witnesses and or a confession.

Good luck.

 

[takingitslow]

Hi Zorn,
I am most likely going to sue my perp and my local authority I am just looking for a local lawyer first and also how I am going to fund the case. It will probably be very expensive. In the UK the court fees are linked to how much you are looking to claim so if I want to try and claim high damages then the case will cost a lot more to administer if there is no settlement before court. It is estimated the case could take 2-3 years with any negotiations, evidence gathering as you have to have both parties doctors examine you and it is a long drawn out process. It is very very very unlikely the other party will admit liability and pay up straight away.

Worth considering- as it is a civil case (as opposed to criminal case) you will lose all anonymity as a party to the case so technically any news reports on the case would most likely end up on the internet so a google search with your name associated. That is something I have to take into consideration as it could harm your future career ect.

I would look to do the case sooner rather than later because the opposing lawyer will try and minimise any impact the abuse has had on your life so for example they might go through your whole life and try and say other life choices led to any harm you have and not the abuse. It will be very messy. Also the longer you take to start a case the opposing lawyers will try and say you have gotten over the abuse and now your motive for this action is money because of _____ they'll try and come up with some ludicrous arguments just to unnerve you. I am not saying that you won't win compensation but as all cases are different the compensation might not be worth the risk to your reputation, the stress might not be worth X. Obviously upon consulting a lawyer they will give you a ball park figure of what they want to claim in damages so life changing money if you were awarded it would be worth going for provided the person you are suing can afford to pay you it.

The longer the time span from the abuse to when you sue the longer there is for the lawyers to fine comb your life and they could choose any life events after the abuse to examine you under oath and make the experience as stressful as possible. Most lawyers are psycho/ sociopaths and will try anything to bend the truth/ argue some absurd point to suit their position.

Only you know whether a civil case is a good idea for yourself but there is a lot of things you have to consider.

Take care.
Dan.

 

[Bluedogone]

Very well said, Dan.

You've laid out exactly what can be expected from defense lawyers. The harsh reality is they have no factual defense, so they attack the abused. Without a doubt compensation is warranted, and a lot of it, but it takes a courageous stand and a looong fight to get justice.