Check

Well,

That seemed to have worked. So now I'll just retype the whole damned thing in this format. If this goes thru, third time will be the charm.
 
Here we go! This is the one I have been trying to post all night.

Some of the stories that I have read since coming here have lead me to believe that my own experience was little more than a holiday at the beach with the family. Comparatively speaking, what I thought was abuse was actually just the youthful play of loving step-brothers. And to think, I have allowed myself to be screwed up for so long simply because of a few years of adolescent experimentation and a prematurely advanced libido. Well, I guess I can forgive myself for that, especially considering that none of it was my idea. The confusion over sexuality caused by the experience can be chalked up to a pre-existent predilection. Otherwise the whole thing probably wouldn't have happened and I would not have been such a willing participant. The fact that I frequently enjoyed myself and still have rousing memories of the events is proof of that. Right?

So anyway, I was taking a break from writing the above little piece of self minimization when I read this note from Eddie to another new member here, Loki:

"One bit of advice I would offer is to try your best not to gauge the abuse you received against others which can have the effect of causing you to minimize your own story when you read some of the horrible things that happened to others. Everyone's story here is painful, real, and horrible to them, no matter how much more horrible someone else's may be. I've seen many stories that make me think "Hey, I didn't have it so bad." But then I remember how bad it was for me and I know that's not rtue. My therapist put it tino perspective when she said "If I get a burn all up and down one arm, that hurts really, really bad. If I get burns all up and down both arms, that hurts really, really bad too. But just getting burned on one arm, doesn't make it hurt any less."

Thanks Eddie, I needed that. For a while there I started to believe that I had no right to feel the way I do. You have reminded me that I own my feelings. Sure, things could have been worse. Things sure could have been better also.

Someday it might be nice to lose all of this resentment. But until that day comes, it is my pity puddle and I will wallow as I choose.

Aden
 
Hello Aden, I think most people have done this in one way or another, I sure know I have. I used to meet up with people that had horable stories to share and I would think man I do not have it bad at all, maybe I wasn't abused. I know now that is not true. What happened to me hurt me and I did not deserve to be treated in that way. I wish you the best of luck and hope you recieve all the best things this world has to offer.
 
I fet humble too reading the post, but hey when you I look back and count the whole shitpile up, I really don't know how anyone could survive, but we do, as best we can.

Any abuse is all the same, as much as perps think you like it, they must never have been there, or they surely would never have done it to others, knowing all the mental abuse that ensues.

Families broken up, bottled emotions, nightmares, the list is endless, but these are the extra things we all had to cope with, and still be kids, don't think so, no kid should ever have to face this, Hell on earth is not a replacement for a childhood, lost but never forgotten

ste
 
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