Bondage, S and M, sexual abuse link
I think this subculture has a really high incidence of sexual abuse. All the patterns are there, if you think about it s and m is really two adults repeating sexual abuse over and over under the guise of being conscentual. If you have been sexually abused, and suddenly this world comes along that says, "No, really, its okay that your a complete fuck up and nobody loves you, you will find acceptance here. We understand that people like you have no inherant value of thier own, so if you just listen to that quiet little voice in your head, we will be glad to rape you over and over for our own gratification."
Its like saying you can have a surrogate parent or abuser who will repeat the trauma over and over again. You can be stuck as that poor kid who was molested and look for the same love you were never given over and over again. Some extreme bondage people use conditioning and hypnosis to keep them in that position forever. The real irony is the conscentual remark. How consecetual can it be if you are willing to cause pain on someone who doesnt have enough self initiative and respect to want to have someone else control thier lives and hurt them over and over again?
I think that this is a real problem that people just tend to sweep under the carpet as being too "unpleasant". The only orginizations availible to people who want to stop this destructive lifestyle are church freaks and independant therapy. S and M behavior cuts across all social spectrums, rich, poor, people who are considered ugly or beugtiful. I think there is probably a huge link between childhood abuse survivors and sm culture. But the problem is, how are you going to prove it? All the defensive responses your mind uses to block this sort of thing are the same that would destroy the scientific relavance of any interveiws or inqueries of the individuals who are actively participating in it.
This isnt to say that all, or even most, people who are into it have been abused. A lot of people devolope a self image that negative on thier own. People dont really need to directely be told they are worthless in this culture, because if you arent one of those successfull, happy people you see in the tv and the magazines, your automaticly one. The link between your sexual image and these sort of compulsions are undeniable. If you feel ugly, worthless, or ashamed of your sexuality, having somebody provide validation for those thoughts is a really temping escape from reality. Then people just get sucked in from there.
I dont know, maybe i just read too much into things, but isnt it worth checking out? Dont you think that these sort of fansasies are more common among people who have beeen abused?
Well to anybody whos reading this, i wish you the best, take care of your self and try not to be too hard on yourself. Healing is slow. By the time you realized that you have healed at all, you look back and see that even afte all ;you have dealt with things still hurt, and sometimes it seems like the ountain of pain youhave been hiding behind has not only fallen on top of you, but gotten bigger. On days like that, just try and remember your still alive, your still fighting to hang on, and you have already begun the journey of a million miles. Every day you hang on and deal with the abuse is another step towards your goal.
Its like saying you can have a surrogate parent or abuser who will repeat the trauma over and over again. You can be stuck as that poor kid who was molested and look for the same love you were never given over and over again. Some extreme bondage people use conditioning and hypnosis to keep them in that position forever. The real irony is the conscentual remark. How consecetual can it be if you are willing to cause pain on someone who doesnt have enough self initiative and respect to want to have someone else control thier lives and hurt them over and over again?
I think that this is a real problem that people just tend to sweep under the carpet as being too "unpleasant". The only orginizations availible to people who want to stop this destructive lifestyle are church freaks and independant therapy. S and M behavior cuts across all social spectrums, rich, poor, people who are considered ugly or beugtiful. I think there is probably a huge link between childhood abuse survivors and sm culture. But the problem is, how are you going to prove it? All the defensive responses your mind uses to block this sort of thing are the same that would destroy the scientific relavance of any interveiws or inqueries of the individuals who are actively participating in it.
This isnt to say that all, or even most, people who are into it have been abused. A lot of people devolope a self image that negative on thier own. People dont really need to directely be told they are worthless in this culture, because if you arent one of those successfull, happy people you see in the tv and the magazines, your automaticly one. The link between your sexual image and these sort of compulsions are undeniable. If you feel ugly, worthless, or ashamed of your sexuality, having somebody provide validation for those thoughts is a really temping escape from reality. Then people just get sucked in from there.
I dont know, maybe i just read too much into things, but isnt it worth checking out? Dont you think that these sort of fansasies are more common among people who have beeen abused?
Well to anybody whos reading this, i wish you the best, take care of your self and try not to be too hard on yourself. Healing is slow. By the time you realized that you have healed at all, you look back and see that even afte all ;you have dealt with things still hurt, and sometimes it seems like the ountain of pain youhave been hiding behind has not only fallen on top of you, but gotten bigger. On days like that, just try and remember your still alive, your still fighting to hang on, and you have already begun the journey of a million miles. Every day you hang on and deal with the abuse is another step towards your goal.