"Being Ignored"

[Chey-Wy]

Hi everybody,

Tonight I was in chat and someone said that one of their triggers is being ignored. I had never thought about it ..... but that is somethng that really triggers me into remembering my S A. Maybe it has something to do with a feeling of bieng alone. The other people in chat tonight agreed that being ignored was also a trigger for them. I just was wondering if this is a trigger for anyone else? It was a big insight for me.

John

P. S. I am going to add a reply to this. I don't feel ignored here in chat. You guys are great. I have been igonored by Employers, Family, and the Church where I was sexualy asaulted. It seems that when I get "blown off " ( and it does not have to be related to the S A ) by these people that triggers memories of the S A.

 

[Lloydy]

Did someone say something ????

Sorry Chey' couldn't resist that one, but you're right, It's hard to come somewhere like this, especially as a new guy, pluck up the courage to post something, wait, and have no response.

I doesn't happen often, some of us are just too mouthy to remain quiet for long, but it can be a big blow to someones confidence to remain ignored.

Lloydy

 

[Wuamei]

John Chey:

I had a tough time with this in online forums I went to a while back, tho none of these was uniquely male or for survivors, and I know others had the same kinds of struggles. Part of the reason I kinda went off-line for awhile.

I think survivors may be especially sensitive to this; at least I am, for two reasons: the attention I got, and got accustomed to, as abusive as it was; and the neglect I also experienced, including the abandonment of my father leaving when I was three and my mother putting me in a children's home when I was 12.

Just some thots I don't know your situation that well. But I can kinda relate.

I'm trying to remember that other people here & in other forums probably feel ignored--and needy--too. It helps me to be reminded. I've also found its rarely if ever personal. Still hurts tho. So take care of yourself and keep sharing as you can & need to.

Lloydy: Neeahahaahah! Everybody's a wisse guy today! Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk!

Guys I'm hearing a lot about ya'll being in chat on days or times there are no scheduled chats that I know of. Of course I haven't tried to get in since last time I had trouble, weeks ago. Sounds like some of you are in there a good bit tho. Maybe I'll try dropping in. Still kinda touch about some bad experiences in chats awhile back. But I've been here long enuf it seems I can trust myself to trust you guys. Later.

Wuame

 

[Lloydy]

The other night I was trawling through the Friends & Families forum looking for a particular post from way back and I noticed then just how many posts had "0 replies" next to them.
I looked at a few and they were from people seeking help, and I found it very sad that they recieved no replies.

But they were generally older posts and I think most of us look through the other forums fairly regularly now.

Lloydy

 

[Cement]

I have a major issues with "not being heard." I am not sure what it even means or exactly when it hjappens, but I really cannot stand it if I think someone doesn't get what I am saying.

So, I hear you.