What is it like to sit by yourself/with yourself? What are places you go or things you do when you want to spend time alone? How does it feel-- is it difficult? Is it enjoyable? Are you used to it or do you avoid it?
As always, thank you for reading and answering! <3
Well Logan, I do live alone as I don't have a spouse. I do manage to get out and spend time volunteering at a local ministry helping people. I also have my church activities as well. But then I go home and I'll tell you for me it can sometimes be torture being alone because I'm really not my best company. I tend to think too much and sometimes the loneliness is unbearable.
I have a hike I love to take alone. It takes me to a cliff overlooking the ocean. I like to meditate and the sound of the waves crashing below helps clear my mind. I only get there once every year or two these days.
Quieting the conscious mind is one of the hardest parts of meditation for me. I think those of us with dark memories often fear it because those ugly memories of trauma can come flooding in if we silence the other regular thoughts of a busy day. But with practice I've gotten better at sending all thoughts on their way without dwelling and returning to meditation.
It's when I'm in that state that I can feel the energy returning to stabilize me, build the courage I need and quiet the negative thoughts. So for me, time alone is a restorative experience that I love.
Edit: Apologies. I didn't see until after I posted that this thread was for trans survivors (which I'm not). No disrespect meant to anyone. I'll leave what I said, but if it's not helpful please disregard.