Beginning to lose it...

[LupinIII]

...I am beginning to become unglued. The new job I went for is going south fast. It will be very hard to stay there financially and I will have to find a new position soon.

This is making me feel like no matter what I do it turns to shit. I am beginnig to get very depressed at night and I am not improving.

To make matters worse the therpaist I was going to see near my house now has a long waiting list (which is probably good because I do not want a female therapist right now when dealing with issues re my mother).

At work there has been a woman flirting with me and this has triggered many emotions I never realized I had before. When a woman is interested in me I have always felt like I had to be interested in her as well. There are all sorts of messed up things going on with me and woman..and intimacy with women...nothing is going to come of her flirting, its harmless...however the emotions it produces are real as are the understanding of my f-ed feelings towards women.

I am really coming unglued and don't know what to do. It almost feels like I am headed for a nervous breakdown.

 

[The Dean]

Take some deep breaths, shake your arms out, stretch a little, and tell yourself that you are not losing your mind. There is no evidence that you are.

It is normal for you to have conflicted feelings about women and sexuality, especially since you were harmed by a woman.

You do not have to get rattled if a woman finds you attractive. You do not have to let them paw you or make sexy remarks to you. So, you really are in charge to a degree. The feelings just happen and can be a nuisance--but they need not control us.

Jobs are difficult to come by these days. So I wish you well in looking for a different and better paying job.

Bob

 

[MikeNY]

OK, amongst other things, just tell the woman that you are uncomfortable with her flirting and that it is not appropriate. If it is real flirting, it does count as sexual harassment in the work place. As for the other stuff, I can't tell you how many bad choices I've made throughout my life, including trusting my perp. I've made an awful lot of good choices too.

 

[LupinIII]

She's fine...it's not that I am hurt by what she is doing..and I am at a point in life where hamrless flirting is fine...its that it triggers certain feelings...feelings I am forced to look at (good thing) but during a time of great stress (bad thing).