back sooner than i expected

back sooner than i expected
S

shadowkid

WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shado
first i need to say being away from here has been real hard didnt know really how much i need all of you ,i went to drug rehab but like everything else it wasn't that simple ,i have detoxed ,they said the meth is out of my system ,weird huh if you smoke pot it stays for months but something like meth is gone in days . i am at my stepdads i have some decisions to make i guess . after the first day at rehab they put me in the hospital with iv to get some food into me. sometime during the night i started having seizures ,which they said could happen from withdrawl ,i also have a history of seizures ,but this was different the seizures were real bad and they didnt stop ,i was having one like every 5 minutes ,they gave me some medicine called tegretol and the seizures stopped . so they started doing tests to see if there was some other cause ,they did eegs ,ct scans ,and sleep tests ,they took me off the med and put me to sleep with the wires hooked to my head,they could tell when the nightmare started ,and in like seconds i started having the seizures again . so they decided that it wasnt withdrawl ,and did more tests they found out that from when my eye socket got smashed there were little pieces of bone like splinters left in the left side of my head and one of them has fluid around it thats causing pressure on my brain and is making my left eye weaker and weaker also they said there are scars on my brain from the head injuries and they can cause seizures or i could have epelipsy, they said you can get that from brain injuries. so i need some advice i think. they want to drain the fluid and get rid of the pressure ,im afraid to ask how they do that .they think the pressure is causing the nightmares and the seizures ,if that dont work then they say its probably epilepsy and ill have to live with it . they said i could loose sight in my left eye if the pressure keeps building,but its only 50 50 that doing that will stop the seizures . i asked why i aint had seizures all along i only had one in ten years .they said that they dont know why but people with head injuries can be ok for years and then have seizurers.should i let them do the surgery ? what if it dont help .i have to sign papers saying i wont blame them if im screwd up after or if i die . untill i get the medical stuuf fixed i aint had any time to talk to the t there .but i passed a drug test for meth so at least thats good .i really missed all of you .you cant imagine how much . i have to decide pretty quick if i want them to do it .but my mind is so tired from the tests ,the seizures ,and the detox that i cant hardley think .but boy can i eat!! guess thats another after effect of detox ,nothing is safe if its not alive i'll eat it lol .im back on the tegretol so the seizures have stopped.been sleeping 10 or 12 hours a day with no dreams . adam
 
( ( ( ( ( (((((Adam))))) ) ) ) ) )

Welcome Back!!!!!

You are very much in my thoughts and prayers. I don't know what to say in way of advice. I just think if it were me, I would want to do it. but I'm not you. Whatever you do, you have my support.

Love ya

Darrel
 
Adam

WB- glad you can eat, after what you've been through I don't think Einstein could think clearly. Glad you're living clean, that's a tough thing to do. All the best

Halibut
 
Adam - glad you are are back, sorry you have new issues to deal with.

A completely different issue - a couple of years ago I had a kidney stone, which I eventually passed naturally. Doctors still wanted to investigate, and that meant putting a camera down my uretha (last place in a million years I would ever want one with my abuse issues) through to my kidneys, under full anaesthetic (even worse with my trust issues). I am now 49. I managed to tell them about the abuse (basics) and that I was concerned - they explained everything to me...what would happen, how long I would be out for, how I would feel afterwards. I felt much more able to go through with it after this discusssion. They were also impressed that I had told them about being abused, rather than lying there bottling it up.

What I am saying is: they are experts, and sometimes we have to trust people. Listen to their advice - they wouldn't knowingly set out to harm you - they are not the monsters from our past!

Best wishes ...Rik
 
Adam,

Good to see you, Buddy. Sorry about all the medical stuff that seems to be going on.

If it were me, I'd do the surgery I think. I'm no physician, but it would seem to me to be a relatively non-threatening surgery as far as major difficulties resulting from it.

Hugs,

John
 
Adam,

It's very cool indeed you want to know what your friends here think what decision you should make about this possibility for surgery, but hey, none of us are doctors (so far as I know)! If your doctors are recommending the surgery you should listen to them. Don't worry about the release you will have to sign. I think anyone who has surgery these days has to sign one of those - it's the hospital, surgeon and doctor's protection against a patient saying later that they didn't know some crucial piece of information.

It's great to see you have your appetite back - it's a really good sign you are bouncing back. And the seizures are gone as well? It sounds like so many things are going your way.

Much love,
Larry
 
Good to have ya back Adam! I know we have not really talked but I have read alot of your post and I am happy to know your back around. I have no idea what to say about the surgery but if there is a chance it could help I would go through with it personaly.

Josh
 
Adam,
I had a girlfriend for 3 years that had epilepsy. It is very controllable with medication, although they do have to keep changing the medications up. tegretol is one, there is dilantin...it makes your gums receed, finabarbitol(i am sure I am misspelling all the medications) and that makes you sleep. The surgery to releave the pressure is not a terrible surgery. I have known someone who had surgery for pressure in their eye socket...went well and they did not have to worry about their vision. Just make sure you are comfortable with whatever you decide and do some research so you can ask informed questions. Good luck and we are all with you!!!
BC
 
How old is the doctor? How many years has he done this kind of surgury? On what basis does he presume to know that this physical condition is what is causing your nightmares?

I strongly suggest that you see a T for some sessions before you make such a major medical decision. Those doctors don't know a lot about your past, only the medical records. They don't know about your abuse, and why you have those nightmares. They have no clue unless you told them about all of your past. Did you tell them all about your past?
 
Adam I have had many operations over the years and the one thing I have learned is this. I can trust any doctor who anserws all my question and expales in a good way.

Best of luck,I will be thinking about you. Tom
 
Adam,

no advice here, the surgeon is the one who tells you whether it will be better to do it.
Losing an eye is not so good, and these operations are pretty safe these days.

Hey, we missed you too, and if you do go through with the op, you will have all of our good thoughts for your recovery.

Glad to see ya :)

ste
 
Adam,

Been thinking of you a lot. Glad you made it through that. I've missed your posts. Glad you are feeling better and eating.

Your friend, Dale
 
Adam,
Welcome back! We missed you on here. You have a lot of decisions to make in a short time. I'd trust the doctors as long as they spend a lot of time with you and answer all your questions. An interesting take on life in a hospital...My mother used to be a nurse. She always told me to quietly and confidentially ask a favorite nurse what their opinion is about the doctor's advice. Most of the time they will gush with confidence if they like and trust the doctor. If they seem to hedge about a doctor, ask for a second opinion from another doctor. As I think about it, second opinions are a good thing anyway.
Glad you're eating and dealing with all this.
Paul
 
Adam,

I hope that kid sees you again, because you must have given him inspiration.
You never talked about that, but go on, dont be shy and tell us what you told him.

My mind cries out to God, when I meet kids who are hurt in the world that should be theirs to just be kids.

I used to work too near to this type of thing, but guess God gives them the strength that he gave you as a little boy, and all of us, to get through the impossibe.

How much strength did the little guy show you, and I bet he wants to meet you again.
Make a visit to make him feel safe, its the best thing you can do, but say there are loads of us praying for him.

Mean it,

ste
 
thanks to everyone for being my friends through all of this i had one thing i never had before ,a place to come back to . maybe i depend on this site more than most but its given me something that i really cant get anywhere else ,a feeling of belonging to something ,i call it family and for me it is . the site may have some small problems now and then,but what family dont ?i wondered if maybe i was spending too much time here ,it took one week for me to realize i cant spend too much time here,i missed this place like i would have missed my family if i had one. without all of you i would be alone with all the shit . thanks k? adam
 
ste to answer your question ,i told him that meeting him was so cool and that if he wouldnt give up neither would i .i wanted to thank him for showing me how small my problems really are .i will see him when i go back i hope we can talk again
 
(((((Adam)))))

good to see you back

I aint no doc - and I hate docs myself - but I guess that if there is a chance that surgery could make you feel better then perhaps it's worth it - just get all of the info about the proceedure that you can before you agree to it...

yeah - I agree - this place is family to me too...

TJ jeff
 
Adam, the best drug anyone can give is hope.
You gave that kid hope and helped his will to survive, what more can anyone do.
The little guy was saying OK, I fight, and I may win, but if I dont win, I have done my best.

How can you match the strength of a little boy who says that!
I hope he wins ;)

ste
 
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