another explosion...

[phoster]

Well, I lost my cool again last night. I hate it, because I know how I used to feel when my father went off on me. My son doesnt do what hes asked, and in fact seems to do the complete opposite on purpose. It flies all over me, and last night, I exploded. It wasnt even what he did, but that he stared me in the face and out and out lied to me, denying he did anything. I wish I was more patient and understanding. I wish I could be perfectly calm no matter what, but Im just not. As my first therapy session grows closer, I really hope I can get a handle on my anger and depression. I dont want to damage my kids, or loose my family over it.

My wife and I were doing so well too. I had managed to confront her over how I felt unfulfilled with our sex life, and with the low level of intimacy we had. We were working really hard to move closer, but I know shell be pissed that I blew up again. I hope I havent undone all the progress we made.

 

[Lloydy]

phoster
If you explain to your wife, and maybe your son as well, what you've just explained to us; then maybe that'll help ?

The one thing my wife insists on is that I share things with her, and she's right. It's no use keeping the crap inside us, how much can we store away anyway ? it has to go somewhere, so we explode.

If you're seeing a therapist, tell them everything as well.
If you want it to work bad enough, then it'll work.

Dave

 

[phoster]

i'm learning to share. it's hard sometimes, because i have withdrawn my whole life. i have been doing better at it. to give myself credit.

i start therapy, as long as the insurance holds out, on the 19th. am really looking foward to it in a way. i have carried this all inside for so long, i just want to get better. i have high hopes.