ambushed by my family!!

[TJ jeff]

Shadowkid,

This post has been a very emmotional one for me to read and follow along with as well - my heart goes with you as you journey through this troubleing time...

I am my Grandmothers (Dad's Mom) caretaker - she is 88 - luckily she is still in good health - I have lived with her for 8 years now - I am closer to her than to any other relative I have

I lost my Grandfather (Mom's Dad) just this past spring - I left so much unsaid because I never had the privacy I felt I needed to talk with him (Mom was always there and she is a big part of the problems from my past) - at the funeral I was a totaly emmotional zombie - I was the pillar of strength for the rest of the relatives - but I was dieing on the inside

I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your grandmother - I know that by the time that you read this the funeral will have already passed but I have said a prayer for you and your grandmother and hope that you got through it ok...

I am sure that the reading of the will is soon to follow and that the relatives will all be totaly outraged - but stand strong - you have the love of your grandmother and the law standing behind you - Do not let them coerce you into giving them anything...

Please keep us updated - our thoughts are with you...

TJ jeff

 

[endlessjourney]

Hey shadow

I know the ambush feeling. I admire you strength and courage to express your resentment. I spit on my perp when I had gotten into an argument after not seeing him for a while. I went to confront him but I was too pissed off at the time and used every ounce of energy I had not to hit him. His son, my nephew, is very special to me and he was only 3 years old saying, Uncle Jason, Uncle Jason, what are you doing? Please don't hurt my daddy! On that note I left and went home feeling like garbage. I curled up on the ground and cried in a screaming tone. I could have killed him but in actuality, I felt weak as hell afterwards. Then my mom attacked me saying and I got the infamous line, "your breaking up my family"! In actuality, if you or I were doing anything, were we helping to fix our families and taking whatever steps we could to see that none of that shit happens again. Do you think anyone else in the family will leave their kids around your cousin alone now? It's less likely. More power to ya. It sounds like it would be a good idea to express your anger to your family and to expose your cousin more and more and more until you feel satisfied. Just be careful in how you do it. The more you do this, the more power you will regain that you lost from your abuser and those who didn't protect you. Your feelings are accurate and justified. You have every right to be pissed. Good luck with what you do. I know its hard. Just know your not the only one.

Jason

 

[Morning Star]

All power equations that we experience are created on the inside, that is the more powerful we feel on the inside the more powerful experiences we have, experiences that affirm our power.

As a true reflection of our inner equation, the more power less we feel on the inside the more power hungry we get on the inside. Because, a truly powerful person never looks for external proofs of power. He resides in the knowledge that the true power of Universe resides with him as his inner self.

The stronger our connection, the greater power we feel. Though sometimes after experiencing a great trauma we might loose our inner connection and might start seeking external proofs of our power, while in reality we are looking for proofs of our powerlessness and so we get them. Because life always refleects our inner truth.