Alc/Drug Abuse, Sickness and Healing
My bottom line here is getting feedback from Pot Stoners/Users, Alcoholics or perhaps other substance Abusers, about how to replace the High with a natural high, or at least kill the pain of flashbacks, PTSD, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/CFS or just plain ol blues. Or at least to just share the pains and durations of sobering up...
Well, I:m sick again, I have had this repiratory infection ever since Jr. High when the Abuse stopped and I started repressing the memories. Regrettably the Healing Process seems to have made things worse! I:ve been clean of Pot and Red Wine for a year now, but not by choice - I was coughing up soot, getting/have asthma and generally only able to stay stoned for 20 minutes, alcohol I used at the end cos the Pot stopped working.
I suppose one could say I:m only at 1 year of Healing since sobering up, although my Confrotation and healing process begin in earnest 3 years prior to my forced quitting of Pot (4 years ago now).
For 8 years of San Franciso (Escape From LA!) I received Elavil/Amitriptylyne prescription and was able to wake up without CFS/headaches for the first time in 10 years. Issues remained, but I smoked daily and had the highest quality of living ever...rarely sick, was able to be productive/focused and dare I say it, happy, for the duration of the high and next couple days. Yes, I recognized Big Picture things were not being dealt with, but at least I could enjoy being alive every day. While life was still graded on quality re: *How not-terrible* life is vs. *How good* it is, at least I was content. It seems trying for Happiness has only left me even lonlier and Help Less.
Now I:ve nothing, I:m constantly fighting off colds, it:s just like LA all over again! I swim to get fit, mostly sleep right, but I suppose my insides just get torn up red over the daily adrenalin bursts...perhaps I should get some Valium?! No magic bullets are available to me otherwise...how do drugs (legal or prescribed) fit into the regimen of anyone out there and how can I get High again (or simply not blood red) without using the greatest drug on earth, Pot? Part of my decision to Recover was also based on wanting to get off Elavil (which was prescribed by an Internist, not a Psyche)and confront the reasons for its need, I didn:t anticipate being overwhelmed by all the Reasons! It really seems to me as though I:m never even going to have a day in peace ever again and I wish I:d taken the blue pill to plug back into the Matrix! Thanks, this is only my 2nd post here, I:ve tried to generalize for public use.
Well, I:m sick again, I have had this repiratory infection ever since Jr. High when the Abuse stopped and I started repressing the memories. Regrettably the Healing Process seems to have made things worse! I:ve been clean of Pot and Red Wine for a year now, but not by choice - I was coughing up soot, getting/have asthma and generally only able to stay stoned for 20 minutes, alcohol I used at the end cos the Pot stopped working.
I suppose one could say I:m only at 1 year of Healing since sobering up, although my Confrotation and healing process begin in earnest 3 years prior to my forced quitting of Pot (4 years ago now).
For 8 years of San Franciso (Escape From LA!) I received Elavil/Amitriptylyne prescription and was able to wake up without CFS/headaches for the first time in 10 years. Issues remained, but I smoked daily and had the highest quality of living ever...rarely sick, was able to be productive/focused and dare I say it, happy, for the duration of the high and next couple days. Yes, I recognized Big Picture things were not being dealt with, but at least I could enjoy being alive every day. While life was still graded on quality re: *How not-terrible* life is vs. *How good* it is, at least I was content. It seems trying for Happiness has only left me even lonlier and Help Less.
Now I:ve nothing, I:m constantly fighting off colds, it:s just like LA all over again! I swim to get fit, mostly sleep right, but I suppose my insides just get torn up red over the daily adrenalin bursts...perhaps I should get some Valium?! No magic bullets are available to me otherwise...how do drugs (legal or prescribed) fit into the regimen of anyone out there and how can I get High again (or simply not blood red) without using the greatest drug on earth, Pot? Part of my decision to Recover was also based on wanting to get off Elavil (which was prescribed by an Internist, not a Psyche)and confront the reasons for its need, I didn:t anticipate being overwhelmed by all the Reasons! It really seems to me as though I:m never even going to have a day in peace ever again and I wish I:d taken the blue pill to plug back into the Matrix! Thanks, this is only my 2nd post here, I:ve tried to generalize for public use.
