Abused by my Mother by Emotional/Covert Incest

[lotr]

Thanks FB, I love my mom. She is a good person, very loving and kind. She doesn't have boundaries though. Growing up, she was a practicing alcoholic, dated lots of men. I wouldn't be surprised if she was sexually abused. I miss her, the feeling that she is my mom and I can trust her. I lost that a long time ago. I put up wall around myself. This is an issue that is taking me a long time to work out.

Thanks flying, this is a very good expression of some of my feelings, fears, experiences too. Probably better than I could write it. My abuse in the past has turned me into a huge introvert, trying to stay away from people, I even have sometimes problems just eating my sandwich in a coffee shop seeing a waitress walking around with a low-cut shirt. My mom drank too much, and with each glass she lost more and more of her already almost non-existing boundaries. But sober, she was often a great mother.