A breakthrough?

A breakthrough?
H

Hal

Registrant
Okay so anyone who has seen my post in the family/friends section will know about my boyfriend and what happeded to him. (i thank anyone who took the time to read it)
I think he made a breakthrough today. well this afternoon.
I was sat on the couch , while he was sat on the chair,just watching Tv, After a while he just got up stood in front of me then just sat in my lap. At first I thought that he was going to cry, but instead he just settled down in my lap and carried on watching TV! i was shocked, the only time he sat on my knee/lap was when he was crying, I was really glad he came to me, Does that mean he trusts me? I ddint make a big deal out of it ,because I didnt want to pset him so I just put my arms on his shoulders and he let me. no crying or anything. Then after about 20 minutes he went to sleep on my lap so I carried him in to our bed room and put him on the bed. Hes still asleep now (im glad we have to computer in our room now. it means im still here whe he wakes up.) the only thing that bothered me was after about ten minutes of sleeping he started talking in his sleep, it not the fact that he started talking but what he said, it was somthing like ' he left us he left us.' it may have been slightly different, im not sure, could he ba hving a nightmare about his attack? is this a bad thing or a good thing? Im not sure if he will be able to cope with flash backs, is it a sighn that his mind is trying to recover?
 
it sounds to me like he really does trust you, sean, just dont think that that means he will start acting his normal self, as for the sleep talking thing, maybe he is having flash backs of his attack,just dont start asking questions, let him tell you if you ask too many he will feel overwhelmed, Im glad that he seems better, just keep being there for him, and if he does start to get upset again, just let him come to you ,dont try to smother him, when he sits on your knee when hes cryig just rub his back, or talk to him quietly, about anything, its not what you say its more the tone that you use.
he obviously knows that you wont hurt him, it seems like es not sure what he wants, if he wants you to fuss him or if he wants to be left alone, let him figure this out, in time hell know.
 
It sounds like a good thing, to be able to trust you with such physical closeness. That sounds very positive to me.

I have been told that I talk in my sleep, and I know I do have nightmares, both waking and asleep. The waking ones, of course, are called flashbacks. What I have been told is that flashbacks, and the physical occurences called 'body memories', that they occur when our brains are ready to handle them. Now, it does not at all SEEM that way, believe me. I do not think that ever would they be something positive, that people would enjoy or look forward to! But I can think of times in my life when I would have been to weak to have the memories I now have, and the feelings I have felt. So perhaps it does work as it is supposed to.

I do not know if your boyfriend would have interest in coming here himself. But I can tell you, I would not have survived if I had not come here a year ago. I have still struggled and have had bad times, and still do at times. But this site, and the people and support here, have kept me alive and fighting. I hope that it will prove the same for him, if he comes here. And welcome to you. Thank you for being support to him. I wish you both well.

Leosha
 
leosha is right, I cant really comment on the matter, but i would try and get your boyfriend to come here it will definately help him there are some wonderfull people here.
 
Hal, this area is for survivors to post in. With safety and other similar things being as important as it is to survivors, this section has been reserved for survivors to post in only. We are all more than happy to help you, but please refrain from posting in this section in the future. There are descriptions on the top of each forum describing them.
Thank you.
 
Hal,

What a wonderful description of trust and caringmust be love. Sounds like your friend really put himself, quite literally, in your hands. I dont have anything to say except that he really trusts you.
Good luck to the two of you,

David
 
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