A Break from Worry

A Break from Worry

sweet-n-sour

Registrant
I'm feeling calm this week. This is a bit of a surprise to me since I have the kiddies home and there have been a few squabbles between them. Nothing serious, but the differences they express (loudly) add to an atmosphere of normalcy around here.
I decided to take a break from worry during the holidays. I'm not sure if it is entirely possible or if it's just wishful thinking on my part.
Since my H disclosed back towards the beginning of July, I've had moments that have pendulumed from numb to extreme anxiety. There was definitely a sense of falling unraveled and since things have calmed down a bit I keep waiting for the next crisis-round to approach. This week I began to wonder...what if the biggest obstacles in our relationship are all behind us?
The most difficult part for me to cope with was husband's compulsive acting out and his sexual identity issues. It could have escalated to where he cheated on me...and it appeared as if his fantasy life was progressing in that direction. I happened to read some correspondence on his computer and it was none too soon. In retrospect, this was all for the best...all for the best indeed. I really didn't know the full scope of what his battle with depression was about and he didn't have any plans of enlightening me. On that fateful day he was backed into a corner and did the only thing he could possibly do...open up with the truth.
I can only imagine how difficult it was for him to speak those words, to let go enough to trust me. Inside all of us rests a soul just needing to be understood and loved for who we are.
Between then and now I've seen my H do a complete turn about. In present day he seems more tranquil and there is a sense of self-acceptance. Laughter is gradually overthrowing the one time standard of grumpiness...and we are all very fortunate for this transformation.
None of us can change the past...the only power we have is in how we desire to live today and how we plan to live in the light of tomorrow. Maybe this Christmas I did receive what I had been wishing for...the remarkable gift of having my family back. Peace.
 
Sweet-n-sour
What a beautiful post. With his self-acceptance comes your acceptance of the situation as it is, being greatful for the little advances made. I am so glad that you recieved the gift you had hoped for."the remarkable gift of having my family back"
How wonderful for you. I also had that same gift and the best christmas that i have had in a long time. Far from ideal but the best christmas in a long time, just the same. Happy New Year, light and luv, sis
 
Dear Sis:
Hi. I'm so glad to hear that you had the best Christmas in a long time! Thanks for your reply.
Best wishes and a Happy New Year to you as well!
s-n-s
 
I second everything you said there s-n-s,


I am so happy for you that your christmas turned out to be this way and indeed that you actually made a concious decision not to dwell on things, or worry, but to put all your energy into the way you wanted your christmas to be. I do believe the energy we put into things in our lives, be it positive/negative, greatly influences the outcome of most things. Congratulations for this major achievement. It's really something to stand by the person you love in the face of lying/deciept and not just leave. Then to also be able to move past the hurt, lack of trust etc and influence your lives in a positive way is HUGE!

I wish you and your family all the peace and happiness you deserve,

peace
Beccy
 
Dear Beccy:
Thanks for sending some positive energy with your post! I send a wish in response to you and your family for peace and happiness as well.
Best wishes and a Happy New Year,
s-n-s
 
SNS, I'm so glad you have some peace. I look forward to that one day. This has been the worst time and Christmas in my whole life. Next yr things will be different because either my husband will have improved some, or because I will be divorced and won't be so embedded in all this abuse stuff. It would be nice to be free of it for just 10 minutes.
 
Dear Brokenhearted:
Sorry to hear that your Christmas was lacking. I'm beginning to realize that even though life can throw us some really difficult circumstances, attitude plays a very important part in the outcome. Keeping your chin up and knowing that next year win, lose or draw you'll be all the better for the experience is very monumental.
Take care BH and thanks for your response.
Best wishes,
s-n-s
 
Back
Top