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- Thread starterToad
- Start date
going to meet with the officer this morning. looking through old photos. found a photo of me in 1st grade, where the huge gap in my memory was. Though the Trafficking had started the year before, perhaps it was worse this year....
I can see such sadness and pain in the eues and the forced half-smile. I also notice the 2 neck moles that I still have. May make it easier to identify me in other photos.
I can see such sadness and pain in the eues and the forced half-smile. I also notice the 2 neck moles that I still have. May make it easier to identify me in other photos.
met the officer. Went very quickly. Handed him the photos and he took a pic of my license to confirm my identity so the NCMEC would know definitively where the photos were coming from.
The officer's job was simply to receive the pictures and confirm my identity. He was specifically trained on child exploitation. But we barely spoke. NCMEC will be receiving the pics and processing them on their side.
NCMEC was very interested in my story. Very receptive.
Hey Kal
I'm glad it was a positive reception to your story. I hope that's a trend these days. I remember my days in the '60s I was 14. The guy I was with in the back seat of the car put change into my pocket and told to call my carer, I still had patches on my eyes. I was pushed out of the moving car on a corner with a telephone booth. I found myself sitting in the road when I took off the eye patches. I was really fucked up but I made it to the phone booth and called my carer. It was pretty late at night and some lady came along and saw me sitting in the phone booth. I slammed the folding door shut with my feet up against the door. She went away and came back with two cops. The cops tried to get me to come out but I didn't move until my carer came. he told me to go sit in his car so I then came out and walked right past the cops. The cops asked me nothing, not even my name. zilch! The floor of the phone booth was covered in blood. My dungarees hung on me from being weighed down with blood. They had to see it unless they were blind. They said nothing to me as I walked to the car. After a few minutes, the cops left and my carer and I drove away. This happened in Greenwich Village (west) in November of '65. The cops in those days thought of us in those days as not worthy of help.
Times have changed. At least I hope so.
I'm glad it was a positive reception to your story. I hope that's a trend these days. I remember my days in the '60s I was 14. The guy I was with in the back seat of the car put change into my pocket and told to call my carer, I still had patches on my eyes. I was pushed out of the moving car on a corner with a telephone booth. I found myself sitting in the road when I took off the eye patches. I was really fucked up but I made it to the phone booth and called my carer. It was pretty late at night and some lady came along and saw me sitting in the phone booth. I slammed the folding door shut with my feet up against the door. She went away and came back with two cops. The cops tried to get me to come out but I didn't move until my carer came. he told me to go sit in his car so I then came out and walked right past the cops. The cops asked me nothing, not even my name. zilch! The floor of the phone booth was covered in blood. My dungarees hung on me from being weighed down with blood. They had to see it unless they were blind. They said nothing to me as I walked to the car. After a few minutes, the cops left and my carer and I drove away. This happened in Greenwich Village (west) in November of '65. The cops in those days thought of us in those days as not worthy of help.
Times have changed. At least I hope so.
Cdn Writer
Registrant
Hey, I was trying to write a book to raise awareness of this issue and perhaps suggest some new techniques law enforcement could use to catch these perpetrators.
This may not be a "new" technique but it may not be well known outside of the USA. There is apparently a law in the USA now where if someone views child sexual abuse images, they have committed a crime and in addition to being charged with that crime, the survivors/victims of those crimes can go after this convicted individual in civil court for financial damages. I'm not entirely clear if this is something that law enforcement does automatically for survivors/victims or if the survivors/victims have to initiate this.
I don't know how things like a statute of limitation works - if the photo was taken in 1960s and viewed in 2020, is it eligible? If that photo has been around for years and years, potentially viewed by multiple offenders multiple times.....how do they calculate the damages you can ask for? Does this apply world wide? Like if the photo was taken in USA and circulated from there and was viewed in Germany, does this law apply?
Anyways...... I hope this might help someone if they wanted to check further into this information. I know if doesn't even come close to making things right, but it is one remedy the law is prepared to offer survivors/victims.
Scott
This may not be a "new" technique but it may not be well known outside of the USA. There is apparently a law in the USA now where if someone views child sexual abuse images, they have committed a crime and in addition to being charged with that crime, the survivors/victims of those crimes can go after this convicted individual in civil court for financial damages. I'm not entirely clear if this is something that law enforcement does automatically for survivors/victims or if the survivors/victims have to initiate this.
I don't know how things like a statute of limitation works - if the photo was taken in 1960s and viewed in 2020, is it eligible? If that photo has been around for years and years, potentially viewed by multiple offenders multiple times.....how do they calculate the damages you can ask for? Does this apply world wide? Like if the photo was taken in USA and circulated from there and was viewed in Germany, does this law apply?
Anyways...... I hope this might help someone if they wanted to check further into this information. I know if doesn't even come close to making things right, but it is one remedy the law is prepared to offer survivors/victims.
Scott
Cdn Writer
Registrant
Hi, I couldn't quote my own post but I have been looking further and found the following. I see this as another way to punish the perpetrator(s). It is one remedy the courts have provided to survivors/victims of child pornography.
As I understand it, you register with the Centre for Missing and Exploited Children and when they identify your images in the collections of people they arrest, they notify you and then you can file a claim against those charged for possessing and viewing explicit photos of you.
**I did read somewhere that this was done for the survivors/victims by the courts but I was not able to find that article. I suspect it was written in one of my local newspapers either the Winnipeg Sun or the Winnipeg Free Press in the last 5 years. It may only be applicable to Manitoba, Canada and that's why I don't see more mention of it.
This doesn't come close to making up for the horrid things that were done but it's one remedy the courts offer.
Scott
As I understand it, you register with the Centre for Missing and Exploited Children and when they identify your images in the collections of people they arrest, they notify you and then you can file a claim against those charged for possessing and viewing explicit photos of you.
**I did read somewhere that this was done for the survivors/victims by the courts but I was not able to find that article. I suspect it was written in one of my local newspapers either the Winnipeg Sun or the Winnipeg Free Press in the last 5 years. It may only be applicable to Manitoba, Canada and that's why I don't see more mention of it.
This doesn't come close to making up for the horrid things that were done but it's one remedy the courts offer.
Scott
@Cdn Writer (Scott),
I agree, and that is my hope by registering. Specifically that photos exist and that they can somehow be traced back to my perp-father.
I agree, and that is my hope by registering. Specifically that photos exist and that they can somehow be traced back to my perp-father.
Best of luck with your search Kal. I'm really glad you changed your avatar. It puts a face to the damage and you were a lovely child.
I know a little about Scott from being here on MS and he is a very intelligent and very determined person with a goal in mind. I wish him all the luck in the world that he can accomplish his dream.
I know a little about Scott from being here on MS and he is a very intelligent and very determined person with a goal in mind. I wish him all the luck in the world that he can accomplish his dream.
Cdn Writer
Registrant
A quick note, there may be some confusion.
The laws and websites I have been referring to are NOT aimed at finding the people who took the pornographic images (the producers); these laws and websites are discussing the people who VIEW those images.
(They may also find the producers but that's not the purpose of the laws from my understanding - a lawyer is in a better position to explain this in detail.)
My understanding of the situation is that the law is aimed at the consumer of this product. That particular product, an image of a child being abused is a photograph of a crime and the people who VIEW that image are committing a crime and further victimized the individual who has been used to make child pornography.
As such, it should not matter where the photos are, if someone in USA looks at them, they have committed a crime and they can be prosecuted for it if they are caught. The same should apply if someone in country X or Y views the images.
I am trying to find out how other countries deal with the situation right now but it is slow going. I have to find people in country X or Y and ask them, hope they know. Google is great for USA and Canada, not so much for Europe or Africa.
So....best of luck to anyone who goes after their abuser in civil or criminal court and I hope you'll tell us what the results were.
Thanks all!
Scott
The laws and websites I have been referring to are NOT aimed at finding the people who took the pornographic images (the producers); these laws and websites are discussing the people who VIEW those images.
(They may also find the producers but that's not the purpose of the laws from my understanding - a lawyer is in a better position to explain this in detail.)
My understanding of the situation is that the law is aimed at the consumer of this product. That particular product, an image of a child being abused is a photograph of a crime and the people who VIEW that image are committing a crime and further victimized the individual who has been used to make child pornography.
As such, it should not matter where the photos are, if someone in USA looks at them, they have committed a crime and they can be prosecuted for it if they are caught. The same should apply if someone in country X or Y views the images.
I am trying to find out how other countries deal with the situation right now but it is slow going. I have to find people in country X or Y and ask them, hope they know. Google is great for USA and Canada, not so much for Europe or Africa.
So....best of luck to anyone who goes after their abuser in civil or criminal court and I hope you'll tell us what the results were.
Thanks all!
Scott
Hey Scott.
As you might know that Germany has very lax laws. Finland on the other hand still makes kids in schools swim naked. after swimming they go into the sauna. Houses and apartments all have saunas built-in. I watched a documentary and a teacher asked her kids, 10-years-old, how many kids went to the sauna before coming to school the whole class (25 kids?) only 2 didn't and they probably because they got up late. Companies have saunas built in so after a shift most men take a shower then go into the sauna or at least go home shower and use the sauna. Sauna is a family tradition. Norway, where I was born, has a lot of saunas also but I don't know to what extent.
As you might know that Germany has very lax laws. Finland on the other hand still makes kids in schools swim naked. after swimming they go into the sauna. Houses and apartments all have saunas built-in. I watched a documentary and a teacher asked her kids, 10-years-old, how many kids went to the sauna before coming to school the whole class (25 kids?) only 2 didn't and they probably because they got up late. Companies have saunas built in so after a shift most men take a shower then go into the sauna or at least go home shower and use the sauna. Sauna is a family tradition. Norway, where I was born, has a lot of saunas also but I don't know to what extent.
Hey toad
you can find a perp anywhere but I was trying to say that there is no shame with the naked human body. saunas are like a commandment from heaven. People do go every day and companies have showers and saunas for their people. Houses and apartments are automatically built with saunas. There is a much lower percentage of perps there than anywhere else in the world. I grew up in my early years where we went swimming naked also. we never thought of covering up. We ran to the locker room, stripped, and ran out and jumped into the pool. We took showers together and had our bubble fights. But there were no gawkers. the gym teacher would come in to make sure that we're getting out of there and not killing each other.
As for pictures. Were your pictures ever on the net? because if they were then they still are. They get passed from server to server almost as soon as they are posted. Even old pictures of me from the '60s are all over the place on servers like apple or Google. These are not the porn pictures of me but someone took the time to digitize them and then load them up. So if someone had the prints then they also had the porn prints. I'm sure the porn movies are someplace on the deep net and places like that. I've never seen any.
you can find a perp anywhere but I was trying to say that there is no shame with the naked human body. saunas are like a commandment from heaven. People do go every day and companies have showers and saunas for their people. Houses and apartments are automatically built with saunas. There is a much lower percentage of perps there than anywhere else in the world. I grew up in my early years where we went swimming naked also. we never thought of covering up. We ran to the locker room, stripped, and ran out and jumped into the pool. We took showers together and had our bubble fights. But there were no gawkers. the gym teacher would come in to make sure that we're getting out of there and not killing each other.
As for pictures. Were your pictures ever on the net? because if they were then they still are. They get passed from server to server almost as soon as they are posted. Even old pictures of me from the '60s are all over the place on servers like apple or Google. These are not the porn pictures of me but someone took the time to digitize them and then load them up. So if someone had the prints then they also had the porn prints. I'm sure the porn movies are someplace on the deep net and places like that. I've never seen any.
Hey Toad
The people who handled me made sure that I was tanned from head to toes also. Yes, I didn't have control over the pictures or movies taken of me. I didn't have control of myself. This was my life. Friends were street kids turning tricks or other kids like me being sold. Porn will always sell. I'm sure that everything that was taken of me is somewhere on the net. The movies were most definitely digitized and are someplace on the deep net. One, unfortunately, involved the death of an 8-year-old boy, I was hanging only 10 feet away from him. I've come across many naked pictures of me on Russian naturist sites. How did I get there? This wasn't porn just bare butt pictures that were also taken for the magazines sold on the Manhattan corner newsstands in the early '60s. The pictures taken in the '60s are as good as any picture taken today. Color porn pictures at that time were developed by organized crime labs. The really horrible stuff didn't start until I was 10. My school attendance and grades were taken care of. I was never left-back, and even missing more than half a school year was also taken care of.
I don't think it bothers me anymore, like it used to, with having my porn pictures on the net. First of all if someone recognizes me they will say nothing to me because wherever you found that picture you shouldn't have been.
The people who handled me made sure that I was tanned from head to toes also. Yes, I didn't have control over the pictures or movies taken of me. I didn't have control of myself. This was my life. Friends were street kids turning tricks or other kids like me being sold. Porn will always sell. I'm sure that everything that was taken of me is somewhere on the net. The movies were most definitely digitized and are someplace on the deep net. One, unfortunately, involved the death of an 8-year-old boy, I was hanging only 10 feet away from him. I've come across many naked pictures of me on Russian naturist sites. How did I get there? This wasn't porn just bare butt pictures that were also taken for the magazines sold on the Manhattan corner newsstands in the early '60s. The pictures taken in the '60s are as good as any picture taken today. Color porn pictures at that time were developed by organized crime labs. The really horrible stuff didn't start until I was 10. My school attendance and grades were taken care of. I was never left-back, and even missing more than half a school year was also taken care of.
I don't think it bothers me anymore, like it used to, with having my porn pictures on the net. First of all if someone recognizes me they will say nothing to me because wherever you found that picture you shouldn't have been.
often a combination of both.
Hey Toad
Like KAL said but if that dead feeling lasted very long then it sounds like you were drugged.
Not being able to control what was happening to you is a horrible feeling. Quaaludes were a big thing in my day. They were all over the place. Giving a kid just a little cut from the pill would make him just floppy, not able to do anything, and would feel dissociated. That's what Bill Cosby used to take control of his victims. but he gave them a full dose so they just passed out.
Like KAL said but if that dead feeling lasted very long then it sounds like you were drugged.
Not being able to control what was happening to you is a horrible feeling. Quaaludes were a big thing in my day. They were all over the place. Giving a kid just a little cut from the pill would make him just floppy, not able to do anything, and would feel dissociated. That's what Bill Cosby used to take control of his victims. but he gave them a full dose so they just passed out.
Toad
Registrant
I think you are right and I doubt that was the only time I was drugged. If I was drugged often when it happens my memories make a lot more sense.
Trigger-
I have been wondering if being drugged and being limp makes the raping less physically damaging. Not being able to put up any resistance.
It just bothers me sometimes that if you are 2-5 and being raped that nobody noticed.
And I think drugging me might have helped them avoid detection.
Although, I read an article for pediatricians that said often with boys being raped there isn't much physical evidence except anal redness and perhaps a little tearing for a day or so afterward. But it heals really quickly and little kids are very elastic so pediatricians can't often tell and parents may not know. My parents were busy trying to put food on the table. And they both had hard childhoods that they were still struggling from and were checked out emotionally. They just weren't able to be mentally or physically around all of the time. I am sure they had no idea what was going on. They blamed my nightmares and anxiety on low blood sugar. Not that I was being raped.
I do know that many are physically hurt and even killed. But a for a lot of boys the perps need to be able to take them home without them being hurt too bad to avoid detection.
Trigger-
I have been wondering if being drugged and being limp makes the raping less physically damaging. Not being able to put up any resistance.
It just bothers me sometimes that if you are 2-5 and being raped that nobody noticed.
And I think drugging me might have helped them avoid detection.
Although, I read an article for pediatricians that said often with boys being raped there isn't much physical evidence except anal redness and perhaps a little tearing for a day or so afterward. But it heals really quickly and little kids are very elastic so pediatricians can't often tell and parents may not know. My parents were busy trying to put food on the table. And they both had hard childhoods that they were still struggling from and were checked out emotionally. They just weren't able to be mentally or physically around all of the time. I am sure they had no idea what was going on. They blamed my nightmares and anxiety on low blood sugar. Not that I was being raped.
I do know that many are physically hurt and even killed. But a for a lot of boys the perps need to be able to take them home without them being hurt too bad to avoid detection.