I'm glad you tried seeking therapy. It's hard to read there's no path towards them at present.
Are you writing? If so, mine made me cry all the time, it was very hard. It was my personal need, and I wonder what you think? Here at MS, and writing was about 6 months of my self care in these 2 years.
My call to RAINN gave me a phone number for short term talk. I can't know if there's such a place for short term talk near you? RAINN might know, and calling them is what I recommend.
1-800-656-4673