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- Thread starteroic
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Can_I_Do_This
Registrant
Howdy Oic,
I'm wondering if you're just allowing yourself some "down" time for all of this stuff to sink in, to become the NORMAL, not the NEW NORMAL. Anything NEW takes getting used to. You'll get there I suspect.
Shit man, until then enjoy the down time, relax, you've earned it my good man. Try not to judge your worth based on what you used to do for a living. So you were a good presenter: awesome. I assume you don't work anymore so let it go man. You were enslaved to the paycheck, truth be told. Now you're free. Work didn't define you.
Treat yourself with kindness and do things for YOU. Even if it's just sleeping in late.
One day, one step at a time, and life will begin to make more sense, will become more normal. We're all here for you, man. My instinct is that you are really, seriously progressing in a spectacular fashion.
Good job my brother; I am very proud of you.
I'm wondering if you're just allowing yourself some "down" time for all of this stuff to sink in, to become the NORMAL, not the NEW NORMAL. Anything NEW takes getting used to. You'll get there I suspect.
Shit man, until then enjoy the down time, relax, you've earned it my good man. Try not to judge your worth based on what you used to do for a living. So you were a good presenter: awesome. I assume you don't work anymore so let it go man. You were enslaved to the paycheck, truth be told. Now you're free. Work didn't define you.
Treat yourself with kindness and do things for YOU. Even if it's just sleeping in late.
One day, one step at a time, and life will begin to make more sense, will become more normal. We're all here for you, man. My instinct is that you are really, seriously progressing in a spectacular fashion.
Good job my brother; I am very proud of you.
Chris4TheMill
Registrant
Hi oic,
It's nice to hear about how you are doing these days. I too often wonder about my life right now and what else I should be doing to help "move things along."
Actually....there are things I know I should be doing, but I can only handle so much these days. I too am not working right now and after spending the last 12 years at a job that nearly killed me with stress, I just need a lower stress way of living at present. I find that the body and mind are just rebelling against all the fast multi-tasking that I had to do in my last job where they tried to work me to an early grave.
Keep doing what you are doing. It sounds like you have some good people around you and at least some semblance of a regimen in place.
There's nothing wrong with enjoying the moment, and being thankful for the little things as well as the big.
Blessings to you,
Chris
It's nice to hear about how you are doing these days. I too often wonder about my life right now and what else I should be doing to help "move things along."
Actually....there are things I know I should be doing, but I can only handle so much these days. I too am not working right now and after spending the last 12 years at a job that nearly killed me with stress, I just need a lower stress way of living at present. I find that the body and mind are just rebelling against all the fast multi-tasking that I had to do in my last job where they tried to work me to an early grave.
Keep doing what you are doing. It sounds like you have some good people around you and at least some semblance of a regimen in place.
There's nothing wrong with enjoying the moment, and being thankful for the little things as well as the big.
Blessings to you,
Chris
DanielQ432
Registrant
Yes, it sucks beyond all comprehension. My "new normal" is that my world just changed in a nanosecond 2012. Like you, oic, that label, and the stigma attached to it, and suddenly, it's like I'm some kind of pariah, someone not to be trusted. People who do know are either awkward or ugly to me, some have been very cruel, some incredibly kind. But it averages out to "Oh, Hell NO!" if I ask myself do I want it, how do I feel about it.
When you're so fucking embarrassed to hand a prescription from a psychiatrist to the pharmacist because you are sure they are mocking you behind your back, or patronizing you, then damn, what the fuck good is all of this "medical help" if it makes you feel worse and worse. At least it did for me, but hey, I'mm jaded and bitter beyond belief from my encounter with the compassionate loving supportive mental health treatment I received. Not that they treated me like some kind of criminal and wanted to lock me up for my "crimes" of being scared out of my mind and puking my guts out all day in waves of panic attacks. Nope, not much.
Then, there is the psych hospital day program -- they set the bar so low for "recovery" that it made me feel hopeless. I came from a nice suburban background, and they're talking about how to get help when you're homeless and mentally ill. Like that was my destiny - little wonder I wanted to blow my head off.
So yeah, call me bitter, because I am, bitter and angry and hurt and in mourning for my life, all parts of my life, which were STOLEN from me.
When you're so fucking embarrassed to hand a prescription from a psychiatrist to the pharmacist because you are sure they are mocking you behind your back, or patronizing you, then damn, what the fuck good is all of this "medical help" if it makes you feel worse and worse. At least it did for me, but hey, I'mm jaded and bitter beyond belief from my encounter with the compassionate loving supportive mental health treatment I received. Not that they treated me like some kind of criminal and wanted to lock me up for my "crimes" of being scared out of my mind and puking my guts out all day in waves of panic attacks. Nope, not much.
Then, there is the psych hospital day program -- they set the bar so low for "recovery" that it made me feel hopeless. I came from a nice suburban background, and they're talking about how to get help when you're homeless and mentally ill. Like that was my destiny - little wonder I wanted to blow my head off.
So yeah, call me bitter, because I am, bitter and angry and hurt and in mourning for my life, all parts of my life, which were STOLEN from me.
Can_I_Do_This
Registrant
Daniel,
Come here, man. ((((sincere hug))))
I don't judge you or anyone. You need meds? Take the meds and seriously fuck what anyone thinks. This is all about YOU, Daniel. Everyone else can take care of themselves, you don't have to sweat it, all you need to do is take care of YOUR self. You already know no one else is going to do it for you.
You have every right to be bitter, pissed-off, and in mourning -- you got robbed, dude, like we all did in different but equally damaging ways. You can own that and not be ashamed, the anger is normal and justifiable.
Keep loving yourself, Daniel. I can't emphasize this enough. You're going to get there, I know you are. There's a saying: indifference makes the difference. If you can practice, say, indifference over handing over your prescription, soon all those little bullshit things won't bother you.
You can be in the nursery in a suit and tie crying over the petunias, who gives a fuck what anyone thinks? They have no idea, nor should they. Who cares what they might think? For all they know you just love petunias (I do, too).
I would love to see you out on your acreage taking care of the sweet cherry tree, pulling weeds, getting YOUR LAND back to the way you KNOW you LOVE it: nice and neat and tons of flowers. It's physical labor, it's beautifying your surroundings, and it'll make you feel 10000% better about yourself. Because, what you're doing, is being your own partner, your own Mom. You're doing something NICE and even FUN and you're making the world a more beautiful place -- all for your own gratification and pleasure.
You deserve that, Daniel. I'm grateful you're here, man. Thank you for your honesty and wonderful writing style. What a talent, seriously! You have many!!!!
I got your back, Daniel. I get it.
Come here, man. ((((sincere hug))))
I don't judge you or anyone. You need meds? Take the meds and seriously fuck what anyone thinks. This is all about YOU, Daniel. Everyone else can take care of themselves, you don't have to sweat it, all you need to do is take care of YOUR self. You already know no one else is going to do it for you.
You have every right to be bitter, pissed-off, and in mourning -- you got robbed, dude, like we all did in different but equally damaging ways. You can own that and not be ashamed, the anger is normal and justifiable.
Keep loving yourself, Daniel. I can't emphasize this enough. You're going to get there, I know you are. There's a saying: indifference makes the difference. If you can practice, say, indifference over handing over your prescription, soon all those little bullshit things won't bother you.
You can be in the nursery in a suit and tie crying over the petunias, who gives a fuck what anyone thinks? They have no idea, nor should they. Who cares what they might think? For all they know you just love petunias (I do, too).
I would love to see you out on your acreage taking care of the sweet cherry tree, pulling weeds, getting YOUR LAND back to the way you KNOW you LOVE it: nice and neat and tons of flowers. It's physical labor, it's beautifying your surroundings, and it'll make you feel 10000% better about yourself. Because, what you're doing, is being your own partner, your own Mom. You're doing something NICE and even FUN and you're making the world a more beautiful place -- all for your own gratification and pleasure.
You deserve that, Daniel. I'm grateful you're here, man. Thank you for your honesty and wonderful writing style. What a talent, seriously! You have many!!!!
I got your back, Daniel. I get it.
