30th Birthday. Do I say anything?
mark250676
Registrant
Got my close friends and family coming to my 30th Birthday next sunday. Part of me wants to make a speech saying what I've come through, 90% of them don't know, but should I?
30th Birthday. Do I say anything?
- Thread startermark250676
- Start date
Mark,
The thing I always try to ask myself when considering something like this is will it help to bring us closer together, or perhaps take the friendship to a place where it becomes uncomfortable? Are they in a place where thy can handle the information I am needing to share?
This question you ask is compounded somewhat by the nature of the gathering with any number of people being there, each of whom are probably in a different place in their own journey.
Having said all that, I can see where under the right conditions what you are considering might just be something worth considering. Thanking your friends and family for their support and revealing to them how much it actually means to you by telling a "lighter" version of your story. It could serve to be a catalyst for bring the group closer together. I'm sure other's will have some suggestions as well. Consider these things and then decide if this something you want to proceed with.
On a cautionary note, revealing with the wrong mix of people may have results counter to what you would want to experience.
Lots of love,
John
The thing I always try to ask myself when considering something like this is will it help to bring us closer together, or perhaps take the friendship to a place where it becomes uncomfortable? Are they in a place where thy can handle the information I am needing to share?
This question you ask is compounded somewhat by the nature of the gathering with any number of people being there, each of whom are probably in a different place in their own journey.
Having said all that, I can see where under the right conditions what you are considering might just be something worth considering. Thanking your friends and family for their support and revealing to them how much it actually means to you by telling a "lighter" version of your story. It could serve to be a catalyst for bring the group closer together. I'm sure other's will have some suggestions as well. Consider these things and then decide if this something you want to proceed with.
On a cautionary note, revealing with the wrong mix of people may have results counter to what you would want to experience.
Lots of love,
John
reality2k4
Registrant
Mark,
John said it there.
I would not do it, because you do get a mixed response, and anyway, why spoil a good event.
I always remember the amount of denial in people, or others wanting to be closer, I dont want them closer, not right now.
It is up to you, but tread carefully and have a great b'day,
ste
John said it there.
I would not do it, because you do get a mixed response, and anyway, why spoil a good event.
I always remember the amount of denial in people, or others wanting to be closer, I dont want them closer, not right now.
It is up to you, but tread carefully and have a great b'day,
ste
Mark - when I first came here a couple of years ago, telling anyone was pretty new to me!
I made a post saying that I felt like shouting it from the rooftops so that everyone could hear, but I didn't know if that would be a good thing or not. I was just so pleased that I had finally found a voice. I was also a mess at the time.
People here kindly advised caution, stating that I should control who/when I told. With hindsight, I think they were right, and I didn't rush into anything much I as felt like doing so.
I wouldn't have been able to cope at that time, if I had made an announcement to a large group of people, only to receive a negative reaction.
The advice was good for me! I gradually told more people, then the police & eventually got a conviction. It's still not easy for me even now, because I kept it to myself for far too long before I told anyone (3 decades +).
Use common sense - you know the people that are present. If any of them are bigots / phobics, then I would veer on the side of caution and control who/when you tell.
I very much wish you the best whatever you decide. Remember we are here if you need us!
Best wishes...Rik
I made a post saying that I felt like shouting it from the rooftops so that everyone could hear, but I didn't know if that would be a good thing or not. I was just so pleased that I had finally found a voice. I was also a mess at the time.
People here kindly advised caution, stating that I should control who/when I told. With hindsight, I think they were right, and I didn't rush into anything much I as felt like doing so.
I wouldn't have been able to cope at that time, if I had made an announcement to a large group of people, only to receive a negative reaction.
The advice was good for me! I gradually told more people, then the police & eventually got a conviction. It's still not easy for me even now, because I kept it to myself for far too long before I told anyone (3 decades +).
Use common sense - you know the people that are present. If any of them are bigots / phobics, then I would veer on the side of caution and control who/when you tell.
I very much wish you the best whatever you decide. Remember we are here if you need us!
Best wishes...Rik
I would b e afraid about that fact that some know and others don't. The ones who hear it for the first time then may be hurt that you didn't tell them before.
Just a thought...
Just a thought...